“Maranatha!” said the daughter of God alone with God at her Bible-reading table. “Even so, come, Lord Jesus!” Being a born-again Christian of a woman, she was called “a daughter of God,” because when she did become born again, she was born again into the family of God. Here in her living room this evening she was memorizing Bible verses at her Bible-reading table. Neatly laid out upon her table thus were four piles of loose index cards, each pile for its own purpose. On the front of her index cards were the penciled-in Bible verse reference covering two ruled lines of the ruled front. On the back of her index cards were the typed-up Bible verses themselves on a blank unruled side.
Right now she was re-memorizing the verses in back upon looking at the references in front. Where each pile had her own purpose in her Scripture memorizing, this can be explained in the following personal methodology unique to herself: As for the first pile, this was the done pile; that is, upon testing herself she had correctly recited this Bible verse completely accurately and needed to study it no more. As for the second pile, this was the almost done pile; that is, upon quizzing herself, she had
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gotten it wrong by only a few words here and there. As for the third pile, this was the hard pile; that is, upon quizzing herself, she had gotten it all wrong in lots of places and needed much more study and review of this verse before she had it right. And as for the fourth pile, this was the other hard pile; but in this hard pile, upon quizzing herself, she could not recollect which verse this was from looking at the reference. Where the verse was her stumbling block in the third pile upon recognizing the reference, in the fourth pile the reference was her stumbling block in her not recognizing the verse. In the next several weeks, this daughter of God and Bible student, would learn these verses to mastery. These index cards would get easier for her in each re-memorizing. And they would one by one be promoted to the next easiest pile of the four. And when all the collection of index cards on her living room table were all on the first pile, she would be done memorizing these Scripture verses. And she would then mix them up, turn them upside-down, and look upon the verses and quiz her memory with the references of these verses. There would be three piles in this little project—the first, the done pile; the second, the pile she had guessed correctly, but not with sureness; the third, the pile whose references she did guess wrong. This project focused on studying the references by looking at the verses was much quicker than the first project of studying the verses by looking at the references. And in just a few days, all the index cards would be done, all gathered together in the first pile. But that would not come yet for her till later with this set upon her table now.
This daughter of God paused now to pray and thank her God for this nice table and chair set that Mom had given her when she had moved into this cozy upper apartment not too long ago. The table and its two chairs were a dark brown wood, sturdy, and comfortable. The two leaves at the edges of this table were raised up and latched in place. A homey little table lamp with a swing arm and a shade and a brass base gave light to her Bible studies here on this table. Also upon this Bible-reading table the young Christian woman had a hot mug of Lipton loose tea with her four sugar cubes and her two spoonfuls of Realime lime juice. This was the tea that she brewed through her filter basket of her Mr.
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Coffee coffeemaker. She took a sip from her hot tea mug now and did thank God for her tea. She went on to thank God for her three old-fashioned windows that looked out into the night from where she sat. And she thanked God for her large wooden cross on the one wall and for her portrait of Jesus on her other wall. And she thanked God for her big black radiator that was whistling and clattering now, adding its music to its great heat here in winter. She read a magic marker poster that she had written in black and red and taped there upon the wall: “It is written, ‘For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.’ Ephesians 6:12. Thus my very first memorized Bible verse!” And this daughter of God read her other magic marker poster here on the walls of this living room, this one in blue and red, reading, “It is written, ‘And said, Naked came I out of my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.’ Job 1:21. Thus my very second memorized Bible verse!” She went ahead and thanked God for her discoveries of these verses just a few years ago. She also thanked her Provider for her two other table lamps now upon little lamp tables and adding light to this cozy living room of winter. And she thanked God for the carpet, even though her friend called it “cheap K-Mart carpet.” And she thanked God for the three French doors in this living room—two side-by-side, that led to her bedroom; and one by itself that led to a hallway leading to her apartment door. And she thanked God for her brother who had given her a sofa for her new living room now that she lived in a more spacious apartment. Yet she was most bountifully grateful of all things in this living room for her wooden green bin in the corner at the opposite side of this room. In it was one thing. And that one thing she treasured almost as much as she treasured her Bible. And this one thing was a most happy part of the day that she had become a born-again believer. Within that wooden green bin was the symbol of her first day of salvation. And she prayed now, “Dear Father, would you send somebody my way sometime to whom I can open up
my little treasure chest here and show him or her all and tell him or her all about how you went and
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saved a sinner like myself?” Having prayed this, the daughter of God turned away from that green chest in the corner and resumed her so-happy index card work.
Outside her apartment door stood a young man her age, reading a cardboard poster on her door in alternating blue and red and black magic marker that said the following:
“My due sum epitaph:
‘…, and to be with
Christ; which is far
better:’
–Philippians 1:23.”
He marveled at such words. He needed to know this Christ. He needed to know this person who had written this. He needed to get right with God. Little did he know that a daughter of God was on the other side of this door right now memorizing Bible verses at her living room table as he stood here.
And he knocked on her door.
Having forgotten her prayer after a few whiles in her Bible study, when she heard the knocking on her door, the daughter of God wondered who it may be who was paying her a visit right now. And she got up and opened the door.
The man saw her, and he saw great feminine pulchritude which at first dumbfounded his tongue.
He had not expected to see so fair a gal here, much less any gal. But this gal was a real fox of a woman. Her hair was kind of brown and kind of black. And she had full straight bangs wondrously covering her forehead. And her straight tresses were so thin as to be ravishingly wispy, and they reached down beyond her shoulders. And her eyes were vivacious eyes of brown. Her frame was slender. And what she had on today over her female frame was almost as pretty as her face. This most surprising girl had on a blue plaid long-sleeved cotton blouse, a blue denim vest buttoned up with metal buttons, and faded blue jeans with a metal button fly, and most natural bare feet where she stood. At last he found his words, and he was the first to speak, “Hi. I’m your new neighbor. I moved into the apartment down the hall just yesterday. I kind of saw your sign you had on the door. And I never saw
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a sign quite like that before anywhere. I like it a lot, Miss.”
As for the Christian lady, she did indeed like what she saw in this new man just as the new man liked what he saw in her. Here for real was a real cute guy honoring her with a visit. He was short and skinny for a fellow—maybe five feet eight inches and maybe 140 pounds—hardly any bigger than she herself, who was tall and skinny for a gal. His hair was brown and straight and with guy’s bangs, and his hair was long for a guy but still looked good to her. He had a brown mustache, a brown goatee, and brown still-growing sideburns. He had handsome glasses over his eyes. And his teeth had a most overt overbite to them that struck her as an enhancement to his looks and not as a hindrance to his looks. His nose was too big for his face, but she never liked little noses in men. And he had on a dark blue Jiffy hat and a blue plaid long-sleeved winter shirt that was untucked, and dark blue jeans, and also bare feet.
“Oh, my sign,” she said, stirring herself from her reverie of admiration for this gentleman. “When I die, or if I get raptured up first, I want those Words of God on my tombstone.”
He then said, “My name is ‘Flanders,’” and he proffered his hand.
She shook his hand, and she said, “My name is ‘Lisa.’ Everybody calls me ‘Gravel.’”
“Flanders Nickels, at your service, Gravel,” he said to her in great kindness.
“Lisa Tresses, here to help out,” she said.
“Lisa ‘Gravel’ Tresses,” he said. “That’s a pretty name.”
“Do you have a full name, Flanders?” she asked.
“I was born ‘Flanders Arckery Nickels,’” he said.
“What a name for a handsome fellow, Flanders,” she said. “I like it lots.”
“May I come in, Gravel?” he asked.
“Oh yes. We need to talk about Christ that you read about in my sign,” said Lisa Tresses.
“Do come in and feel welcome, Flanders.”
And he came in, looked around in great delights, and said, “What’s in your green bin there in
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the corner, O Gravel?”
Behold, the prayer of just a moment ago most assuredly answered by God right now! Lisa Tresses remembered now what she had asked God for, and here it was happening before her very eyes and ears. A cute guy wanted to know the secret of her wooden green bin. He was still lost in his sins; the green bin was the symbol to her of her life saved by the blood of the Lamb. Considering this contradiction now in the Lord, Gravel chose to defer this opportunity to see if first she could lead him to salvation by the same blood of the Lamb. An unsaved man might not see her secret as especial as she did; but a saved man would. She must wait to first see if she could lead him to salvation. Maybe he was already born again. She must ask him and find out.
And Gravel asked him, “Flanders, are you a born-again believer?”
“No. I cannot say that I am a born-again believer, Gravel,” he said. Woe unto him and her! He was still lost in his sins after all. She must work on him and lead him to Christ this night.
Then Gravel asked, “Would you like to become a born-again believer, Flanders?”
She saw him turn away his gaze now from her beloved green bin and heard him say, “I’ll be right back, Lisa.” Woe, he ran back to his apartment down the hall so quickly! Was he running away from the Lord? Then he came running back to her apartment. And in his hands was a clock. Why did a clock have to come between him and her all of a sudden? He then showed her this clock: It had a black face with white numbers, and it was a wind-up clock, and it read 8:00 P.M. He then moved the littlest hand to 9:00 P.M. and wound the alarm key and said to her, “My favorite TV show starts in an hour, and I cannot miss that. There are two hot Medieval women on that show that I have to see.”
“You will be watching two Middle Ages women on TV, Flanders?” asked Gravel, her disappointment over his soul and her green bin secret assuaged over this fascinating fetish of this handsome guy.
“Yeah, Gravel—Anne and Lucinda Lacey—sisters in the 1640’s back in Medieval England,”
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he told her. “I’ve got to record it all on my VCR so I can see it again and again.”
Curious as a most fascinated confidante, Lisa Tresses asked him, “What TV show has all of these Middle Ages women that you like so much, Flanders?”
And he said, “It is a Masterpiece Theater miniseries called ‘By The Sword Divided.’ Gravel.
It is about the English Civil War of the 1640’s. The two Middle Ages women in it get married and become Anne Fletcher and Lucinda Ferrar. They both wear fancy dresses with lots and lots of material.
They both speak the English language of the 17th century. And they both have those ravishing looping coils of hair going down all the sides of their heads that were common then in the Middle Ages among women. Twentieth century women are nothing at all like these Medieval women of Europe.”
Getting swept up in his fervor, Lisa asked, “Who plays Lady Anne and Lady Lucinda in this show, Flanders? Do you know?”
“Oh yes! I do!” he said. “Lady Anne is played by Sharon Maughan, and Lady Lucinda is played by Lucy Aston. Do you want to watch it with me, Gravel?” He raised his clock in invitation for her to come on over at nine o’clock. It now read five minutes after eight. She remembered when it read eight o’clock and how disappointed she had rightfully been that he had so quickly forgotten about Jesus. She had fifty-five minutes to get his soul right with God and to lead him to his most needful salvation. Though Flanders could not know it yet, what he needed was a personal Saviour—not more Middle Ages women on TV. And inside her thoughts, Lisa Tresses wished to shun his Anne and his Lucinda. She wanted God. So, too, must he learn in like about God.
Getting her focus back as a born-again Christian, Gravel said to him, “You asked me about my epitaph on my door, Flanders.”
He replied, “Yes. I did, Gravel. It makes it look like you get to go to Heaven after this life is all done and over with.”
“It is true, Flanders,” she said. “I have Christ the Lord as my personal Saviour now.”
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Then he asked, “What were you like before you had Christ the Lord as your personal Saviour,
Gravel?”
Lo, this was an open invitation to the daughter of God to give a testimony of her old life of sin without God and without hope in this world. And she willingly shared with this confidant how bad she had been as a girl before she repented and found Jesus. And she said, “Before I had gotten saved, I used to write about witches and wizards, Flanders.”
“Like the occult, Gravel?” he asked.
“Yes, Flanders. Satanism in fantasy stories,” she told him.
“That’s a very bad thing to do. Isn’t it?” he asked in sincerity.
“Yes, Flanders,” she said. “And near the end there I was hoping to become a very real witch for myself.”
“That’s even worse,” he said in discernment.
“I even thought how sweet life could be if I found a handsome wizard and married him,” confessed Lisa Tresses.
“That would be a trap that you would never be able to get out of,” he said to her in the wisdom of a third party.
“I could not see that then. I was deceived by the Devil my father,” she said.
“Is the Devil the father of all wizards and witches of all the ages?” asked Flanders.
“Much more, Flanders, the Devil is the father of all the unsaved people of all the world of all the ages,” she declared with Christian wisdom.
“Does that mean me, too?” he asked.
“Are you an unsaved person, Flanders?” she asked him in great earnest of soul-winning.
“I am not a saved person like you, Gravel,” he said in truth.
“You are then lost in your sins, and the Devil is your father,” she said boldly and mightily.
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Yet even despite this hard saying, this handsome lost man with her here was not offended by her truth. And he said to her, “I can tell, Lisa, that you know things about God and the Bible and truth
that I do not know in my life. I believe you when you say that I am a child of the Devil. And I can tell that you care for my soul very much. And even more than that, in my priorities, I can tell that you have a crush on me. Well, I have a crush on you, girl, too. And because of that, I want to hear you tell me more about this God Who saves.”
“Amen!” she said to this in great relief after she had told him that right now he was diabolically wicked as she did.
He then asked her, “Am I on my way to Hell because Medieval women are more attractive to me than the man Jesus in all of His glory?”
“No. That is not why, Flanders,” she said.
In pursuit of truth, he asked her, “Am I on my way to Hell because Medieval girls are more important to me than the Lord Jesus?”
“Kind of, Flanders,” she said.
“Maybe I am on the road to Hell because I know all about Medieval ladies and nothing about God.” he said. “Might that be why?”
In sum she said, “Flanders, the reason that you are going to Hell right now is because you have not accepted the free gift of eternal life.”
“That is a happy answer, Gravel,” he said.
“You need not give up Lady Anne and Lady Lucinda in order to get to stay out of Hell,” she said.
“That is a most glad answer for me to hear, Lisa,” said Flanders to the daughter of God.
“Who knows, Flanders, maybe the two actresses who play those Middle Ages ‘girlfriends’ of yours might also be born again as I am,” said Lisa Gravel Tresses.
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“By ‘born again’ you mean ‘saved,’ don’t you?” he asked.
“Yes. I do, Flanders,” said the daughter of God.
“Then I want to be saved, too,” he said. Then he said something most appropriately and delightfully romantic that stirred her woman’s heart into wild hopes of companionship in her lonely life without boyfriends: “And if a beautiful twentieth century woman like you is born again, would I not want to be born again just like her?”
And she asked, “You really think that of me, Flanders?”
And he said something most novel both to himself and to her, “Gravel, I think that I love your hair even more than I love Lady Lucinda’s hair.” Lucinda was more attractive to him than Anne.
And now it sounded like Gravel was maybe a little more attractive to him than even his Lady Lucinda!
A pretty girl can stir up a man’s heart into new worlds—both in the seventeenth century and in this twentieth century. And Lisa Gravel Tresses was now competing in this man’s heart with the best of Medieval England and its women.
“Flanders, you’re making me dizzy,” she confessed in giddy feelings of romance.
Then this cute guy who wanted to be her boyfriend in sincerity and humbleness went and asked her again, “What’s in the green bin there in the corner?”
This time she did not hesitate. She would go and open it up. She would take it out of the wooden chest. And she would show it to him. It was time. To make sure, she asked, “Flanders, are you ready to hear how I got saved myself just a few years ago?”
“Yes. I am ready, Lisa.” he said to her. “Tell me all.”
“Are you sure that you are ready?” she asked.
“Uh huh!” he said, nodding in great eagerness. “I’ve got to see what is so valuable to you that you keep it in a bin with a lid like that. It must have everything to do with when you got born again.”
“You won’t laugh at me when I show you. Will you, Flanders?” she asked.
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“I will not, O Gravel,” he said. “I know now that salvation and anything relevant to the Saviour is not a laughing matter. Do let me see what you have in your wooden treasure chest. And then tell me how you got to be a believer.”
“Well, well, well,” she said in great excitement, and she went up to her wooden box, and he followed her there. Lifting the wooden lid, she reached down and pulled out a most intimate garment, and held it up before him by its shoulder straps.
“Why, it’s a swimsuit!” he said in great admiration. “It’s a women’s one-piece swimsuit!” Then he said, “Sexy, girl! S-E-X-Y!”
“A black one-piece swimsuit, Flanders,” she did say.
“A black one-piece swimsuit with very colorful thin V-stripes along the top—along the shoulder straps and over all of both cups, Gravel,” said Flanders.
“Those V-Stripes on my women’s maillot they call ‘a chevron pattern,’” said the daughter of God. “Do you like it?”
“I love it, woman,” he said.
“So do I,” said Miss Tresses.
“Does your maillot have any tags inside for me to read, Gravel?” he asked.
“My boyfriend wants to look inside my women’s maillot,” she flirted with him.
“I always wondered what one-piece swimsuits were made of,” he said. “The tags within could tell me.”
“Ooo, Flanders, do go ahead and look and see,” she said. And she let a man hold up her prize of a maillot in his hands.
“This feels good in my hands,” he said. “I bet it feels even better on all of you.”
“Oh it does,” she said. “It surely did.”
And Flanders Nickels read the tags within out loud: “Made of Antron Nylon/Lycra Spandex,”
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“Size 9/10,” and “Le Cove Swimwear,” Then he said, “I don’t know which of these three tags I like best, Gravel.”
Then she said, “Now you know my favorite fabric and my size and my favorite swimwear company, Flanders.”
“Name and rank and serial number, Lisa,” he teased her.
She reached out both hands toward her maillot he did hold in both of his hands, and he let her have it back. “You didn’t see the inside of the cups, did you, Flanders?” she asked.
“Yes, I did, Gravel,” he said. “They both looked like white plastic coverings.”
“You didn’t see the inside of the bottom of the suit, though,” she said.
“Yes, I did, Gravel,” he said. “I saw a piece of tan fabric over the black fabric down there.”
“A women’s maillot crotch liner,” she confessed with the knowledge of a woman.
“I can see that this one-piece swimsuit gets real low in the back,” he said.
“Indeed a woman can show a whole lot of her back dressed in this, O Flanders,” bragged Gravel on her prize of a maillot.
“I like it this way,” he said.
“Such a maillot style is called a ‘scoop back,’ Flanders,” said the daughter of God.
“And you said that this has a lot to do with the day you became a Christian,” he said.
“The best day of my life,” she said avidly.
“Was this what you were wearing when you became a believer?” he asked.
“Uh huh! Yes! Yes! Yes!” she said. “I had this on when I got saved.”
“What a thing for a girl to wear when she finds God,” said Flanders in hearty approval.
“I was at the lake. I had this maillot on for my first time. And a little man with a big Bible came along. I was wading about in the water up to my hips in this swimsuit. And he was standing on the sandy shore in his swimsuit. Then he called out to me and said, ‘Old girl in the Sear’s store
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one-piece swimsuit, may I share the Word of God with you?’ Whoa, how did he know that?” said Lisa Gravel Tresses.
“Did you buy it at Sears then?” asked Flanders. She nodded. “How did he know that?” asked Flanders.
“I went and asked him that that day at the lake,” she said. “And he told me that he worked at
Sears these last ten years and that he was in charge of the women’s department. In fact he went on and told me that my one-piece swimsuit was made in Mexico. And he said that pretty soon the women’s swimwear manufacturers were going to quit using Antron in their making of one-piece swimsuits.”
“Then what did he say?” asked Flanders.
“Well I was the one who spoke next,” said the daughter of God. “I went and asked him what that great big book was that he held in both hands. And he told me, ‘It is the Authorized King James Version Holy Bible.’ Then he asked me again, ‘Could I show you some from the Word of God?’
And I said, ‘Yes.’
And he said, ‘Come out of the water, old girl.’
Flanders said, “’Old girl.’ That’s twice that he said that.”
“That was what I was back then. I was fifteen years old. Now I am twenty years old,” said the daughter of God.
“The old girl has since become a young woman,” said Flanders. “Did you come out of the water to him then, Gravel?”
“Yes. I did. And right away he started preaching to me wonderful words of life from the Holy Bible and telling me all about Jesus the Saviour of the world and all about Heaven and all about Hell,” she said to Flanders.
“What did a teen-age girl in a teen-age girl’s maillot think when an older guy started to read from the Bible to her?”asked Flanders.
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“Even though we were alone at the lake, I knew that this guy would not harm me. I could see Christ in him, and I could see that he was a good man, and I could see that he would never hurt me.
Even then and there, when I was still lost in my sins, I could see that this man had the Holy Spirit within him. And before too long, after hearing him preach Christ crucified and risen again to me, I was suddenly ready to receive Christ. And we both got on our knees in the rough wet sand near the waves, and with me in my wonderful new one-piece swimsuit, he led me line-by-line through a most eternal prayer that saved my soul. This fellow called it ‘the sinners’ prayer.’ I prayed that prayer, accepted Jesus’s free gift of eternal life, and got saved doing it. Then he told me, ‘Congratulations, old girl. You have just accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Saviour.’ Then he said, ‘I must go now to the next lost sheep of the Good Shepherd.’ And just like that, the great big Holy Bible in both of his arms, he left to look for another soul to win for Jesus. He never did tell me his name. And I never got to tell him my name. I wish that I had his great big Bible in my green bin as well. But this is what I have yet from that very good day.” And she raised a shoulder strap of her maillot between her thumb and index finger in indication.
“I bet that you look great in it still,” said Flanders Nickels.
“I have grown since that day,” she did say. “I’m not sure if a girl grows much after she is fifteen years old. Here I am twenty now, and I might be too tall now for this maillot. I don’t know.
I’m afraid to find out.”
“You’re nice and skinny enough to look good in this one-piece swimsuit,” said Flanders.
“What a thing to say to flatter a young woman,” she said in gladness and flirt.
“I’d put it on myself, but I would look awful silly dressed in that,” he said.
“Leave the one-piece swimsuits and the two-piece swimsuits for your girl to wear, Flanders,” she said in great pleasing coquetry.
“For my girl?” he asked in good coy fun.
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“If you do choose to become my guy,” she said.
“If you do choose to become my gal,” he said.
She held up her one-piece swimsuit in the air before him, then set it down upon her living room table on top of her King James Bible.
Then he said, “Now you need to tell me all about what your friend at the lake told you about being born again.”
Oh yes! She had set about to try to lead him to salvation; she got to tell him the testimony of her own salvation; she got all caught up in her one-piece swimsuit; and she forgot why Jesus had sent him here. Her job was to lead this lost sheep to the Good Shepherd. And she must now get back to her witnessing to him. This cute guy first had to become a Christian before she could date him. And tonight needed to be his own first day of salvation. In her thoughts she prayed to God to forgive her for her straying from doing His work on Flanders. And, taking her maillot off of her Bible, she began, opening her Bible among the many index cards upon her Bible-reading table. She showed to him Hebrews 9:27 and read it to him out loud as he read it to himself in silence: “And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment:”
Just then there arose a most awful and discordant ringing of a bell here in this living room. It was coming from on top of this table where she and Flanders were sitting. And it was his wind-up alarm clock. It was now nine o’clock. He had to go see his Medieval women on “By the Sword Divided.” Her one hour had passed, and she had not won his soul for Christ. And now was apparently too late to do anything more for this man she admired and for whose soul she had a burden.
Flanders Nickels stood up now at this table, He put his hand to the back of his clock and turned off its alarm. And he stood there for a moment of indecision. And he said, “I hate to have to leave like this, Gravel. My TV show is for one hour. It will be done at ten o’clock. Will you be up then? May I come back at ten and continue our talk then?”
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“But then it will be too late, O Flanders!” cried out the daughter of God. “Alas, it may be too late right now already!”
“I promise to come right back tonight right after my show is done,” he said. “Do you go to bed at ten o’clock, Gravel?”
“I go to bed at midnight every night,” she said.
“Then could we talk about Jesus for two hours tonight when I come right back, Lisa?” he asked.
“Flanders, if you leave now, the Devil will surely make sure that you do not come back here again this night, whether you think to come right back or not,” she said.
“Right now on Masterpiece Theater Alistair Cook is probably talking about the Middle Ages right now and about what Anne and Lucinda will be doing in tonight’s episode,” he said to her.
“It is written, Flanders, ‘(For he saith, I have heard thee in a time accepted, and in the day of salvation have I succoured thee: behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.) II Corinthians 6:2,” recited Lisa Tresses upon the urgency of this hour for his eternal soul.
“What does that mean?” he asked.
“It means that if you do not get saved now, you may never get saved later, Flanders,” she said.
“That is in the Bible, Gravel?” he asked, still standing at the table.
“It is a New Testament verse referring to an Old Testament verse,” she said.
“Right now the music of the miniseries is probably playing and the Medieval girls’ names are probably on the screen right now in front of a picture of Arnescote Castle,” he said.
“It is written in the Old Testament this cross-reference,” she recited, “’Thus saith the Lord, In an acceptable time have I heard thee, and in a day of salvation have I helped thee: and I will preserve thee, and give thee for a covenant of the people, to establish the earth, to cause to inherit the desolate heritages:’ Isaiah 49:8.”
He asked her again, “What does this same-sounding verse mean, Lisa?”
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“It means the same kind of thing,” said the daughter of God.
“That the best time for me to get saved is right now,” he interpreted correctly.
“Yeah! Yes!” she said.
“You really care about me,” he said. “Are you sure that I would not come back tonight or come back tomorrow sometime and finish what we started tonight because I want to watch TV right now,
Gravel?”
“The Devil does not want to lose you to the Lord this night, Flanders,” said Lisa Tresses.
Right now on his Middle Ages show Lady Lucinda Lacey was probably saying sweet things to her betrothed, and Flanders was not home to see and hear her. He said to Gravel now, “You do have pretty brown eyes, Lisa. Lucinda does not have the eyes that you have.”
What a surprise of spontaneous flattery! “Will you stay then?” asked the daughter of God.
“And your outfit is prettier than Lucinda’s outfit,” he said in great surprise for Gravel. “She may be dressed as a Medieval maiden, but you are dressed like a classy, snazzy girl with what you have on right now, O Gravel.”
And here he sat back down at the table to continue their date this night. “Oh, you will stay!” she sang out.
“You make me interested now in modern women,” he said. “I want to stay with you now and not go back home to TV’s Anne and Lucinda Lacey.”
“Do you wish to stay also because you are curious about being born-again, Flanders?” she asked.
“The funny way I feel now tonight, Gravel…,” he said. “I would rather hear you tell me about God than to hear my Medieval English women talk about the English Civil War of the time.”
“Where should I begin?” she asked herself out loud.
And he answered her question saying, “You told me about a Bible verse about judgment,
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Gravel, just before my wind-up clock alarm rang.”
“Oh yes. Hebrews 9:27,” she said. And she recited, “And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment:”
He said, “Judgment is a hard word.”
She said, “The judgment seat of Christians is a time of rewards for faithful service. But the judgment seat of non-Christians is a time of degrees of punishment for every sin committed.”
“Good for the saved, bad for the unsaved,” he said.
She then showed him the verse Matthew 25:34, and he read it in silence from her Holy Bible:
“Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:”
She said, “This kingdom mentioned here is sometimes called ‘the kingdom of Heaven,’ and sometimes called ‘the kingdom of God.’
“Paradise!” he said. “I want to end up There when I die. Heaven is not the place for a guy like me to miss out on. It has to be better Up There than it is down here, Gravel.”
Lisa Gravel Tresses then showed him the verse Matthew 25:41, and he read this verse in silence from her Bible also: “Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels:”
“This is Hell,” she said. “This becomes the lake of fire meant originally for the fallen angels, but now also for the people who die lost in their sins.”
“Torments!” he said. “The place so bad that swear words are based upon it. The last thing that I want to do after my life is done and over with is to burn in fire for forever after.”
“Are you scared about going to Hell now, Flanders?” asked the daughter of God.
“Yes. I am right now, Gravel,” he said. “I want now very badly to no longer have to be afraid of going down there. Right now, the way I live my life, I am a cursed.”
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“Let me help, Flanders,” she said. “God can use me to get you born again right now.”
“I am ready!” he said.
“I shall lead you down the salvation verses believers like myself call ‘the Romans’ Road,’ Flanders,” she said,. “These are verses in the book of Romans that soul-winners like myself share with a lost person seeking to become saved.”
“Show me the first one,” he said, eager to read more from the very Good Book she had on her living room table here.
Lisa Tresses opened up her King James Bible to the book of Romans, and she now began to share with this handsome prince the plan of salvation: “First comes Romans 3:10-12, Flanders,” she said.
And he read this passage out loud: “As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God. They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one.”
“Second comes Romans 3:23,” said Lisa Tresses.
And he read this verse out loud unto himself: “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;”
“Third comes Romans 5:8,” said Gravel.
And Flanders Nickels read out loud the following: “But God commendeth his love for us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”
“Fourth comes Romans 5:9,” said the daughter of God.
And he read this out loud as well: “Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him.”
“Fifth comes Romans 5:12,” said the young lady.
And Flanders read out loud: “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death
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by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:”
“Sixth comes Romans 6:23,” said the witness-warrior.
And the man Flanders read out loud this: “For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.”
“Seventh comes Romans 10:9-10,” said the soul winner.
And Flanders read out loud: “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.”
“Eight comes Romans 10:13, Flanders,” said his Gravel. “That is the last verse of the Romans’ Road.”
And Flanders Nickels read out loud this culminating verse: “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”
And Lisa Gravel Tresses went on to say to this man searching for eternal truth, “Now let me explain what these Bible verses say.”
“Preach to me and teach me, Gravel!” exclaimed Flanders, whose soul was ripe for salvation right now.
And the Christian woman began a salvation sermon all about these verses of the book of Romans that were all new and mystifying and confusing to him upon reading them for his first time.
She said, “Flanders, down here on this Earth, there are no people who are righteous in themselves.
None of us in our own goodness can please the most holy God. It is not in us as sinners to honor and praise and glorify our Maker and Creator on our own. We are all born into this earth as sinners the moment we come out of the womb. All humans everywhere hold on to our sin nature. And we cannot measure up to God in His Greatness. Why is that? Because you and I are flesh and blood, and He is Spirit and Truth. What is sin then, you might think? Sin is any thought or word or deed that rebels
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against the authority of God or that breaks any of the commandments in His Holy Bible. Yes, the Lord is holy and pure and righteous—yet He still loves us nonetheless. After all, God the Father sent His only begotten Son—the man Christ Jesus—to die on the cross for us. And this Son of God died for us all even when we were filthy dirty with sin. On that cross of Calvary, Jesus shed His precious blood for us. His crucifiers nailed His hands and His feet to the cross with spikes. They pushed down a crown of thorns into His head. They scourged Him front and back with a cat-o-nine-tails. And they thrust a spear into His side. It is this shed blood of Jesus that made an atonement for our sins. Being justified by His blood makes us in His sight ‘just as if we have never sinned.’ Because Jesus bled, we do not have to end up in Hell every last one of us. Sin, Flanders, originated on this Earth back in the garden of Eden with Adam and Eve. God said to Adam, ‘Thus saith the Lord.’ The serpent came along and said to Eve, ‘Yea, hath God said?’ And Adam and Eve came to doubt God and His Word. And they together sinned in a simple act of disobedience—they both ate of the forbidden fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. This first sin of mankind brought the curse upon the world, and Adam and Eve began to age and did grow old and did in time die. We, as Adam’s descendants, all inherited sin in our natures from him, sin passing down the human race from generation to generation. And because we sin, we must someday die. But physical death—that called ‘the first death—is not the only wages of sin. Sin also brings about the second death, and the second death is eternity in the lake of fire. This eternal damnation in Hell’s fires is the way people can pay God back for their sins, so bad is sin in God’s eyes. But Christ came to pay for our sins Himself, to suffer in our place, to die in our place, to redeem us from our sins, so that we do not have to spend one second in Hell. That is why the Gospel is called both ‘the saving Gospel’ and ‘the Gospel of salvation.’ And the Gospel is the good news of Christ’s death and burial and resurrection. Because Jesus died for us and rose again from the dead, we all can go to Heaven for the rest of eternity in our lives to come. This forever after in Heaven is called both ‘eternal life’ and ‘everlasting life.’ The Lord Jesus is the hope of a lost and dying world. And
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because of His finished work on the cross and His glorious Easter miracle of the resurrection, this future in Heaven with Him is absolutely free. You cannot buy this salvation. You cannot earn this salvation. You cannot work for this salvation. You can only accept this salvation as the free gift of eternal life that it is. This is a present to any who do ask for it. Right now, Flanders, God is here in this room with us. He is holding out this great wonderful present of salvation out to you right now as I speak. And He is saying to you, ‘I did this for you.’ See this gift, Flanders. Reach out for it. Take it. Say, ‘Thank You, Jesus.’ And cherish it. He wants you to have it. All you need to do is to humble yourself before Him and say, ‘Be merciful to me, O God, a sinner.’ Confess to Him that He did die for you and did rise again the third day. You already know about this Gospel message in your head. Now move this Gospel message one foot down into your heart. Realize, O Flanders, not just that He died and rose again for the sins of the whole world, but, rather, more personally, that He died and rose again just for you. Think upon this: If you were the only sinner in a world of sinless people, He would still have gone to the cross just for you. Think upon this, too: If you were the only person in all of this Earth, He would still have gone to the cross for you. Think upon this: ‘Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.’ This is John 15:13. This, and this most of all, tells of God’s perfect love for you and for me, O Flanders. And all that you need to do to get saved is to right now call upon the name of the Lord and pray for this free gift of endless life in Heaven Above.”
The daughter of God finished her preaching of the Romans Road to Flanders Nickels here in her living room. And she awaited what he had to say now with bated breath. He had to get saved! He was too handsome to slip away from her and God now.
And Flanders Nickels now said, “Right now must be my time of salvation, Gravel. What must I pray to become born-again like yourself? I am ready to accept the Saviour.”
“Amen! Amen! And again, Amen!” she sang out in great joy of the Lord.
All that remained this night for her work on his soul to be finished was to lead him line-by-line
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through a short and easy little prayer called “the sinners’ prayer.” And then the cutest guy she ever met would be with her and the Lord for the rest of this life and also for forever after Up in Heaven. God is good. God is great. God is grand.
Just then a knocking came upon her door. And what a knocking it was. Though it was not loud or rude, it was persistent and lengthy and at the worst time of her life for such a thing. And Lisa Tresses now remembered not having prayed to God tonight that no interruptions happen were she to lead Flanders through this prayer. She ought to have prayed earlier that God keep the Devil away from this living room table with her date with Flanders tonight in her soul-winning endeavors. And now this was happening. Satan was here. She looked up at her apartment door. He looked up at her apartment door. She turned away from the door. He turned away from the door. They both looked at each other.
In their eyes upon each other, both she and he willed that she lead him through his needed prayer right now despite the knocking. But the knocking did not stop. Sixty seconds passed, and still the continual knocking ceased not.
Taking charge and frustrated at this clamorous hindrance to his praying, Flanders Nickels stood up and said, “I’ll put a stop to this, Lisa!” and did march toward this door with great authority, and with
rancor did open it brusquely to send this interloper away. Gravel had hope in his demeanor.
But in came a beautiful young Medieval woman!
And she said, “I be from the Society of Creative Anachronism. Art thou Sir Flanders Nickels?”
His tone was tragically mellowed now with her here from how is was when he had marched toward this door. “Verily I be he, young maiden,” he said. “Thy voice doth sound familiar.”
“My name is called Lady Gretchen Rourke of Wales,” she said.
“My Middle Ages friend from England!” he said. “Art thou truly she, Lady Gretchen?”
“It is I, O Sir Flanders,” she said. “I knocketh upon thy door down the hall, and methinks that I heardest thy voice over here behind this door. Behold, my Lord Flanders!”
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“Wonder of wonders! I behold thee now for my first time!” he sang out in gladness.
“Who be the fair maiden who accompanies thee this night?” asked Lady Gretchen.
“Her name, milady, is called Lisa Tresses,” said Flanders.
“Lady Tresses,” said Lady Rourke, “Sir Flanders and I have conversed to each other much both by letters and with calls on the telephone for over the year past. Methought to come here to the New World and to surprise him with a first visit. He knew not that I would be here this night,”
Lisa Tresses was too troubled to speak. She simply nodded her head silently in deference to this woman more to Flanders’s tastes than herself.
Then Lady Gretchen Rourke curtseyed before Flanders in her most Middle Ages dress and asked, “Lord Flanders, would you away with me to a Shakespearean play tonight?”
He bowed before her and said, “The honor would be–” He did not say “–mine,” No. He remembered so comely Gravel here with him now. In Lady Gretchen here with him now, he saw the most beautiful Medieval woman of all. In Miss Tresses here with him now, he saw the most beautiful modern woman of all. Both women saw his indecision.
Lady Rourke spoke, “Lord Flanders, come away with me to ‘Romeo and Juliet.’”
And Gravel spoke, “Flanders, it is written, ‘Seek ye the Lord while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near:’ Isaiah 55:6.”
In this time of reckoning for the unsaved Flanders Nickels, he saw a ravishing ‘seventeenth century’ gal living only for this life and without Christ and without salvation, and he saw a most foxy twentieth century gal living for the life to come and with the Holy Spirit indwelling her and with so great salvation. And he made up his mind most irrevocably. He turned first to Lisa Tresses, and he said, “I think that I will stay.” He turned next to Gretchen Rourke, and he said, “I’m sorry. Gravel is my girlfriend. She’s going to lead me to Christ tonight.” His Medieval English language left him.
So final was this pronouncement. The woman from the Society for Creative Anachronism knew
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that she could never be Lord Flanders’s lady. And the daughter of God knew that, yes, she was for sure now Flanders’s girlfriend. Flanders Nickels had decided so, lock, stock, and barrel.
Gracious and kind, nevertheless, Gretchen Rourke bade Lisa to ever treat Flanders as a gentleman; and Flanders, ever to treat Lisa as a lady. Having said this, the most virtual Medieval princess departed. And Flanders and the daughter of God were alone now again, both most eagerly and zealously ready for the prayer that he needed to pray right now. Quickly in silence, Gravel prayed that God keep any more interruptions from happening now for this sinners’ prayer to get done.
Both sitting back down at her living room table, they began this one last detail in order to get him saved from his sins. In prayer, she began: “Dear Father, Who art in Heaven:”
In prayer, he repeated after her, saying, “Dear Father, Who art in Heaven:”
She prayed, “I am a sinner.”
He prayed after her, “I am a sinner.”
She prayed, “I am sorry for my sin. Please forgive me.”
He prayed in like, “I am sorry for my sin. Please forgive me.”
She prayed, “I know that Your Son died on the cross for me and for my sins.”
He prayed, “I know that Your Son died on the cross for me and for my sins.”
She prayed, “I know that Your Son arose from the grave on the third day. He lives!”
He prayed, “I know that Your Son arose from the grave on the third day. He lives!”
She prayed, “He is Lord!”
He prayed, “He is Lord!”
She prayed, “His shed blood saves souls,”
He prayed, “His shed blood saves souls.”
She prayed, “I cannot save myself.”
He prayed, “I cannot save myself.”
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She prayed, “It is You Whom I’m trusting now and You alone.”
He prayed, “It is You Whom I’m trusting now and You alone.”
She prayed, “Please save my soul and become my personal Saviour.”
He prayed, “Please save my soul and become my personal Saviour.”
She prayed, “And give me everlasting life in Heaven.”
He prayed, “And give me everlasting life in Heaven.”
She prayed, “Thank You for keeping me out of Hell.”
He prayed, “Thank You for keeping me out of Hell.”
She prayed, “In Jesus’s name I pray. Amen.”
He prayed, “In Jesus’s name I pray. Amen.”
He looked up. She looked up. She wiped her eye. “Gravel, you’re crying,” said Flanders.
“Yes. I am crying because I am happy,” she said. “You are now saved as I am, O Flanders.”
“I have become a born-again Christian now,” he confessed.
“It is written, ‘I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.’ Luke 15:7,” said the daughter of God. “Again it is written, ‘Likewise, I say unto you there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repenteth.’ Luke 15:10.”
“And I am that one sinner that has just repented,” he said, mightily saved. “All of Heaven knows, and everybody Up There is happy for me.”
“All of the saints in Heaven are rejoicing over you, and I am rejoicing over you, Flanders,” said Gravel.
“I, also,” he said in newfound joy of the Lord.
“Flanders, I have something to ask you,” she said.
“And I have something to ask you,” he said.
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“You first,” she said.
“You first,” he said.
Then they both went first at the exact same time:
Lisa Tresses asked, “Flanders, could I be your girlfriend?” and Flanders Nickels asked, “Gravel, could I be your boyfriend?”
They then spoke both at once a second time:
Lisa Tresses said, “You can be my boyfriend!” and Flanders Nickels said, “You can be my girlfriend!”
Then they became dumb, and they began to laugh in sweet affections for each other.
Then she said, “But what about your nice Lady Gretchen, Flanders?”
“I cannot have two pretty girlfriends in my life, Gravel,” he said. “This day right here she and I said, ‘Fare well and farewell.’”
“I’m sorry, Flanders,” said the daughter of God.
“I had such a crush on her,” he said. “But I was not in love with her.”
Lisa Tresses caught his subtle words, thought upon them, and asked, “Does that mean that you fell in love with me this night, Flanders?”
And he said, “It does, Gravel. It surely does.”
Lisa Tresses picked up an index card from her table, saw the front with the reference Ruth 1:16-17, and turned it over to the back, and did read to Flanders: “…, Entreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge:
thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God: Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me.”
Flanders understood what she just read to him from the Scriptures. He said, “You feel the same way about me, Gravel.”
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“Oh, I do, Flanders. I surely do,” said Gravel.
“You would walk with me at my side for the rest of my new life in Christ, O Gravel?” he asked.
“I surely would,” she said. “Would you let me walk at your side in Heaven as we travel down the streets of gold to go see Jesus, Flanders, in our life to come?”
“I would be most duly honored and happy, Gravel,” he said.
She looked at her empty green bin in the corner. She looked at her cherished women’s maillot here upon her table. She wondered if she could still fit into it. She took it adoringly into both of her hands again.
“Go ahead, Gravel,” he encouraged her. “Put it on.”
“Could I now again, after all of these years, Flanders?” she asked.
“I can tell that you want to real bad,” he said. “Go for it. I want to see my new girlfriend as a one-piece swimsuit goddess.”
“I’ll go and do it then, O Flanders!” she said.
“Amen!” he said.
With a laugh, she said, “What a thing for a Christian guy to say, ‘Amen,’ to!”
“Amen!” he said again with a laugh himself.
Curious and desirous and nostalgic, the daughter of God raced into her bathroom to change “into something more comfortable.” And it fit her just as comfortably as it did when she was a teenager. “Praise the Lord, Flanders!” she exclaimed, coming out of the bathroom. “I can still look good in my old maillot!”
In tease, Flanders said, “What a thing for a daughter of God to say ‘Praise the Lord!’ for, Gravel.”
And then he saw her. Whoa! And he said, “God works in mysterious ways!”
And Lisa Gravel Tresses said to Flanders Arckery Nickels in flirt, “Boyfriend, what a thing to
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say when you see a dream girl in a one-piece swimsuit!”
And the daughter of God and the son of God laughed together in coquetry here on their first date for the rest of forever after together.
Reader, it is written, “And the Spirit and the bride say, Come. And let him that heareth say, Come. And let him that is athirst come. And whosoever will, let him take the water of life freely.”
Revelation 22:17, the last invitation in the Bible.
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