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THE GRANDE PRAIRIE THEOPHANY—A SEQUEL TO TWO

By Mr. Morgan P. McCarthy

            The Grande Prairie Theophany was sitting upon His throne in Grande Prairie, His wrought Paradise in the midst of the Griffin Lands.   Grande Prairie was a sublime field of holiness and godliness, of pastoral peace and blessed countryside, and of green flora and happy fauna.  Before Him where He now sat was the Most Dread Griffin, accusing four born-again believers of Centro, the town in the very center of these Griffin Lands.  The Most Dread Griffin was telling on Flanders and Carol and Proffery and Gravel, all four born again and living for this Theophany.  And he was doing so with malice and vengeance and zeal.  Flanders and Carol and her good griffin Gallant had moved to Centro from the town of Little Grandee.  Proffery and Gravel and her good griffin Valiant had moved to Centro from the town of Five Creeks.  This Grande Prairie Theophany was the Father of all the Tawny Benevolent Griffins and all born-again Christians and all good angels in these Griffin Lands.  And this Most Dread Griffin was the father of all Gray Malevolent Griffins and all those people who were not

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born again and all fallen angels in these Griffin Lands.

            The Most Dread Griffin spoke and said, “O Theophany, did You see what Flanders did yesterday?  He was slacking off at work that day, walking around and talking to lots of customers, hardly doing the work he should have been doing to earn his paycheck.  I even saw him watching the time clock for his last minute of work that day before punching out.”

            The Grande Prairie Theophany spoke and said,  “Most Dread Griffin, it is written, ‘If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.’ I John 1:9.   My son Flanders, that night, confessed to me that day’s sin, and I forgave him his sin.  Now he is clean with a short tab. He will not do such sin again.”

            “O Theophany,” said the Most Dread Griffin, “let’s talk about the women.”  And he went on to say, “What about his girlfriend Carol?  The woman was outside on a picnic table and reading the Holy Bible.  And the wind was fierce.  And it was blowing about the pages of her Bible and making it hard for her to enjoy her Bible study.  And she gave in to frustration, and she said a kind of bad word.  I heard her say it.  So did You.  What do You have to say about that sin?”

            And the Grande Prairie Theophany said, “Most Dread Griffin, the word she spoke was not a malediction, but rather a euphemism.  Such ‘kind of bad words,’ are also sins.  But it is written about the believers, ‘…, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.’  I John 1:7.  My blood shed on the cross cleanses from all sin, O Most Dread Griffin.”

            “What about the other guy in that group that lives for You?” asked the Most Dread Griffin. “His name is Proffery.  I caught him staring at his girlfriend’s skirt portion of her little swimdress that she had on.  And I could tell what he was thinking.  He even wanted to reach out and to touch it.  He was naughty in his mind.  Do you not call that adultery in the heart?”

            “My Proffery was not thinking upon what was inside the swimdress, but rather what it was like to be a girl inside that swimdress.  He was daring to tamper with thoughts of drag, and such drag is

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abomination, nonetheless, in my eyes.  But it is written, O Most Dread Griffin, about Myself, ‘And he is the propitiation for our sins; and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world.’  I John 2:2.  I am this propitiation.  I offered My body on the cross to appease My Father’s wrath at a world of sinners and to conciliate My Father’s favor as the offended God.  My death is Proffery’s propitiation.  And My Father remembers Proffery’s sin no more.”

            “Grande Prairie Theophany,” said the Most Dread Griffin, relentless in his accusations of the Christians, “let me tell you what Proffery’s girlfriend does at church.  Her name is ‘Gravel.’  When she looks around at the flock, she begins to compare herself and to commend herself to other women of the church.  She looks at older women and thinks how they are less attractive than herself.  She looks at bigger women and thinks how they are not nice and thin as herself.  And she looks at the new converts, and she thinks how they are less strong in the faith as herself.  She even looks at Carol and thinks upon herself how too bad it is for Carol that she is a blonde and not a brunette like herself.  This girl Gravel is downright proud.”

            “Most Dread Griffin, you put those thoughts into her head, and she tries to put them down.  She knows that these thoughts of pride are wrong, but she still wrestles with them even as a believer.  It is written, ‘For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil.’  I John 3:8.”  I have been manifested that I might destroy your works.  In time to come Gravel will grow more mature in her faith, and her distractions will go away from her at church,” declared the Grande Prairie Theophany.

            “One last thing, O Theophany,” said the Most Dread Griffin.

            “What is it, most vexing griffin?” asked the Theophany.

            “The two women and their men spend too much time flying around in the skies, riding the two griffins.  They go for joy rides when they could be doing something for You.  It even keeps them from giving out the Word of God,” the accuser griffin said to the Theophany upon His throne in Grande

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Prairie.

            “O Most Dread Griffin,” said the Theophany, “those mistresses and mistresses’ boyfriends and mistresses’ griffins need good fun times together in this life.  I find no fault in their good and wholesome leisure.  They have nothing lacking in their daily commitment to me in their worship and fellowship and quiet time with Me.  I gave them the joy of fun thus for the sake of fun.  And if there is any sin in what I have given them—if they do grab too much of their time and not enough of My time, it is written, ‘And ye know that he was manifested to take away our sins; and in him is no sin.’  I John 3:5.”

            “But if they all really did love You as You love them,” began the Most Dread Griffin.

            “It is written,” said the Grande Prairie Theophany, “’Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us,…’  I John 4:10.”

            With a huff of defeat the Most Dread Griffin left the throne of the Theophany and fled out of Grande Prairie and evil was gone once again from this little Heaven on Earth in this grand prairie of God in these Griffin Lands.

            The four aforementioned born-again Christians and their griffins given them by God were having a good time in games and fellowship at Centro City Park.

            Carol and her boyfriend Flanders were enjoying the merry-go-round with her griffin Gallant pushing the merry-go-round very fast with his eagle claws.  And Carol got so dizzy that she was almost falling off.  As for Flanders, his grip on the bar was more sure, and he was not so dizzy as she.  Both were laughing in gaiety.  And Gallant went on to push harder.  Carol, a former Little Grandee Sprite, was once again dressed in her old high school black and dark blue cheerleader uniform with the long sleeves and the box pleats.

            As for Gravel and her boyfriend Proffery, they and her griffin Valiant were playing on the

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teeter-totter.  The good griffin was standing upon the middle and making it go up and down by shifting his weight from side to side where he was standing.  The bumps upon hitting the ground hurt Gravel’s bottom, but the bumps upon hitting the teeter-totter when she was knocked upward at the top hurt her bottom more.  But this was fun.  Gravel was dressed in her traditional black-and-white Chevron-patterned swimdress.  And she used to be a Five Creeks Trident in her old high school days.

            “Carol,” said Flanders, “you were dating all of the wrong boys before you found me.”
“Yeah.  They were all lost in their sins, and you were saved from your sins,” said Carol.  “You are the boyfriend that God had in store for me.”

            Gravel spoke up and said, “In my case, I was going out with saved boys who were living only for the world, before my boyfriend came to me from God.”

            Proffery spoke and said, “I was a saved boy who was living for God.”

            “You were the right man for a woman like myself, Proffery,” said Gravel.

            “Gallant,” said Flanders,  “could you make this merry-go-round spin a little faster?”

            “No, Gallant,” said Carol, laughing and giddy.  “Make it go a little slower.”

            Yet the griffin pet of the woman obeyed the man, and he made the merry-go-round go around

even faster,

            “Us, too, Valiant,” said Proffery.  “Make it so Gravel and I can go up and down real fast for us at our ends of this teeter-totter.”

            “My bottom hurts already, Valiant,” said Gravel.

            And once again a griffin pet took sides with his mistress’s boyfriend over his own mistress.

            And Valiant began to jump to the right and to the left over and over again, making the teeter-totter go up and down wildly and in a frenzy.

            Lo, at the spinning merry-go-round, Carol fell off and flew off several feet to the side and landed in a pile.  And she did lie there in delightful dizziness and much giggling and quite unharmed.

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Flanders remained on this merry-go-round, holding on very tightly with both arms.  He called out nonchalantly, “Carol, are you okay?”

            “I’m all right, boyfriend,” she said.  “Blooming griffin of mine.”

            “I thought that you were,” said Flanders.  “Too bad for you.”

            Then Gallant spoke and said, “You should be more careful, O Mistress.”

            Meanwhile, over there at the teeter-totter, Valiant lost his balance, began to fall to the side, and fell off of the teeter-totter’s fulcrum, and landed upon his head off to the side.

            “Ouch,” said Proffery, looking upon the fallen good griffin as he lay there. The teeter-totter was level right now.

            “Valiant!” called forth Gravel his mistress.  And she jumped off to look to her pet.  Lo, when she landed, she fell awkwardly upon her foot, and hurt her ankle.  And right after this, Proffery’s side of this teeter-totter fell down hard, and he landed upon his bottom and hurt his tailbone.  When all of this happened, Gravel could not decide to tend to her griffin or to tend to her boyfriend or to tend to herself.

            But Valiant said, “I’m fine, my mistress.”

            And Proffery said, “I’m good to go.”

            And she said, “I’m not hurting now, either.”

            From over at the merry-go-round, Flanders said, “Hey, you guys over there,  Not so loud.”

Then he said, “Gallant, you could stop spinning me if you want.”  And the griffin stopped pushing the merry-go-round.

            Proffery called back to the three of the merry-go-round, “It’s a good thing for you guys that you are not on a gate.  Those go around faster than do merry-go-rounds.”

            “I prefer a slide,” said Flanders.  The merry-go-round slowed down and stopped.  Flanders then got off and came up to his girlfriend Carol and helped her to get back to her feet.  Carol brushed her cheerleader skirt from sand and stones with her hands.  Then she did the same with her cheerleader

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sweater.

            “You missed a spot,” he teased her.

            In flirt upon hearing this comment, the cheerleader went and punched him in his upper arm.  She at once grabbed her wrist, but his arm felt quite right.

            From over at the teeter-totter, Proffery stood up for his fellow guy and did say, “Serves you right, Carol.”

            “You know what I say about us guys and our girls, Brother,” said Flanders.

            “Oh, that I do,” said Proffery.

            “Tell the women.  They might have forgotten,” said Flanders.

            “I’d be glad to, Brother,” said Proffery.  And he said it, “When a woman hits a man, the man says, ‘Did a fly land on my arm?’  But when a man hits a woman, the woman goes down and does not get up again.’”

            Gallant said, “Valiant, see how much fun our mistresses have with their boyfriends.”

            “Inexplicable,” said Valiant.

            “Teasing talk,” said Gallant.

            “Coquetry,” said Valiant.

            “Not for us sensible griffins,” said Gallant.

            “Things that we griffins do not comprehend,” said Valiant.

            And in the spirit of fellowship the six continued their fun at the park until night.

            Lo, there came a day when the Most Dread Griffin came up to Gallant alone and spoke with him for a while about his mistress Carol.  Not long later that same day, this same Most Dread Griffin got alone with Valiant to speak to him for a while about his mistress Gravel.

            Later, the group of six got together at Flanders’s place out in his front yard.  He gave the testimony of his salvation:  “When I was little, I believed that the Lord and the Devil were equally

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strong.  I thought that they were equal in strength and in wisdom and in all-presence.   The Lord was to me the incarnation of good and of good things and of all blessings.  The Devil was to me this incarnation of evil and of bad things and of all trials.  I loved God, and I hated Satan.  And as often as I praised God for happy things that came into my life, I all the more cursed Satan when unhappy things came upon me.  I thought that I had it all figured out.  As a mortal, myself most lost yet in my sins, I felt as if I were a victim in an ages-long war between God and Devil.  What can a boy of flesh and blood like myself do with the two gods that ruled this Earth?  If I did seek to please God, maybe He might give me another happy moment.  If I did seek to appease the Devil, maybe he might not ‘hit me’ again.  This understanding, this doctrine, I was not taught.  It had come to me in my many reflections as a boy without Christ.   I was lost and without hope.  But then Rex Sunday came to me one day.  He was a traveling evangelist who spread the Word of God to all who would listen.  He was knocking on doors in my hometown, and he came to our door.  Mom and Dad were glad to let him come in, and he talked with us for a long while there in the living room about the Saviour of the world.  Mr. Sunday then said, ‘The Lord Jesus Christ died on the cross for our sins and did rise again to life on the third day.’

            ‘He really did, Mr. Sunday?’ I asked.

            ‘He really did, son,’ said Rex.  ‘This is called “the Gospel.”’

            ‘I don’t think that even the Devil can do that, sir,’ I did say.

            ‘Our God is more powerful than the Devil,’ he went and told me right after that.

            ‘Evangelist Sunday, aren’t they both equal—the Devil and the Lord?’  I asked.

            ‘Nay, my son,’ said the good evangelist.  ‘The Lord is more powerful than the Devil.’

            ‘But how can that be?’ I asked.  I found first hopes now for myself.

            ‘God created the Devil.  He had made him good and called him, “Lucifer,”  But Lucifer went bad and became “Satan,”’ said Rex.

            ‘If the Devil is not one of the two gods of the universe, what is he then?’ I asked.

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            And Evangelist Sunday said, ‘He is a fallen angel.’

            And I then learned the truth about the Most Dread Griffin.

            The traveling evangelist then said, ‘Our God has the very Devil on a leash.  If God consents for His own glory to the Devil doing some of his works of wickedness upon mankind, God lets out the Devil’s leash a little.  If God refuses for His own glory to the Devil doing some of his works of wickedness upon mankind, God draws back on the leash firmly and strongly and does hold the Devil back.’

            ‘Good times and bad times, then, are delegated by the Good Lord alone,’ I said.

            ‘According to His wise and compassionate and loving mercy and grace,’ said Rex Sunday.

            ‘I had too much of the Devil,’ I said.  ‘But I do not have enough of God.’

            Evangelist Sunday then asked me, ‘Flanders, would you like to receive Jesus as Saviour?’

            ‘What must I believe that I can become saved, Mr. Sunday?’ I asked.

            And he said, ‘First of all you need to confess that you are a sinner, and that you cannot save yourself, and that only Christ can save you.’

            ‘Oh, I never heard that.  But it’s true, Mr. Sunday,’ I did confess.  ‘That is I—all sin and no goodness.’

            ‘Second of all,’ he told me, ‘you need to confess the Gospel that I had shared with you when I first came here.’

            ‘I remember how you put it,’ I said.  ‘The Lord Jesus died on the cross for my sins and did rise from the grave on the third day. I believe every bit of that, Evangelist Sunday.’

            ‘Third of all,’ he then shared with me, ‘you need to pray for salvation, trusting the Saviour and Him alone to save you, my son.’

            ‘Pray for salvation,’ I said.  ‘Does that mean that all that I need to do is to ask God to save my lost soul, and just like that He saves my lost soul?’

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            ‘Yes, good Flanders,’ he told me.  “Ask for the free gift of eternal life, and He will give it to you free,’ said Rex Sunday.  ‘It is written, “Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus:”  Romans 3:24.’

            ‘I want to do that right away, Mr. Sunday,’ I said right out.  ‘But what do I say to God to get this free gift of everlasting life the right way?’

            ‘I can lead you through the prayer line-by-line,’ he told me.  ‘We Christians call this prayer “the sinners’ prayer.”  And it is the difference between eternity in Heaven and eternity in Hell.’

            ‘Would you lead me then, O good evangelist?’ I asked.  And he led me to Christ right there in front of all my family.  And then all the rest of my family asked if they could pray the prayer, too.  And he led them to Jesus the same way.  And that is how I became a born-again believer.”

            “Amen!” said the three other Christians upon hearing Flanders’s testimony of his salvation.

            Gallant did not say, “Amen” to this.  Valiant did not say, “Amen” to this.  The two mistresses looked at each other in puzzlement.

            “Gallant, don’t you agree?” asked Carol, unsure about her griffin’s reticence.

            Again did not Gallant have anything to say.  Instead he turned his face away from his mistress in repudiation of her.

            Gravel went ahead and asked Valiant her pet griffin, “’Amen,’ good Valiant?”

            But he, also would not reply or look upon his mistress.

            The men looked upon one another.  Such a weird and stifling muteness so suddenly came upon this fellowship of six.

            Carol and Flanders looked upon each other.  Flanders said, “Perhaps the griffins are lost in their thoughts and do not hear you, Carol.”

            And then, also, Gravel and Proffery looked upon each other, and Proffery said, “They are daydreaming and do not know that you are speaking to them.”

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            Another day, some days later, the group got together for fellowship and good times at Proffery’s place.  They were in his back yard, talking about Jesus.  And Proffery began to tell the testimony of his salvation to the bunch:  “In my own beliefs, I did not believe in an all-evil Devil and in an all-holy God.  I only acknowledged God Himself in this creation. He was the Higher Power over all of the universe.  And I assumed that God Almighty was half-evil and half-good both in one Highest Power.

Jesus Himself I had never stopped to consider in those years of my old life.  Truly I was clueless about the Holy Spirit.  My God as I saw Him was a One-Person Godhead.  He could do bad things to anybody, and nobody could stop Him because He was God, and everybody else was mortal.  Or He could do good things to people, and we people did not deserve this, because we are sinful creatures.

Think what an arbitrary God that the Lord Whom I believed in must have been.  No false religionist told this false doctrine to me.  I was my own false religionist.  Lost people always come up for themselves unscriptural understandings of Who God is.  And religion is full of them.  Only Christianity extols God as He really is.  Well, there was a boy my age in my grade school whom everybody looked up to for always talking about Jesus.  He was called by all in respect ‘Pastor’s son.’  This pastor’s son was the best student in Sunday School at the Baptist church.  And at the public school, he was every teacher’s favorite student.   Everywhere he went and everything he said truly attested to his integrity.  He was the most like Christ of any boy I had ever known.  And he was the only pupil to earn a grade of an A+  in Bible class in every quarter of every year.  I even heard it said that pastor’s son found Christ as Saviour at age three.  His own father had led him to Jesus.  Well, this minister’s son came up to me one day and said, ‘God bless you this day, Proffery.’

            And I said, ‘God blesses, and God curses, O pastor’s son.’

            ‘Proffery, God is a God of love,’ said this boy so full of His love.

            ‘Half of God is love.  The other half of God is not love,’ I told him.

            Pastor’s son was speechless for a while.  Then he asked, ‘Could I share the Word of God with

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you?’  I nodded my head.  And he went on to say, ‘I would be so happy to show you how my Jesus’s love for you is perfect love, O Proffery.’

            ‘I would like that, O Pastor’s son,’ I said with regard and honesty.

            And he reached into his left back pants pocket and pulled out a pocket Old Testament.  In his right back pants pocket he had his pocket New Testament.  And he opened up his little Bible, and he read to me five verses that said that the Lord’s love for me was most far from arbitrary.  They were the verses Lamentations 3:22-26, and this was what they say:  ‘It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.  They are new every morning:  great is thy faithfulness.  The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.  The Lord is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him.  It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord.’

            I thought upon these words of Scripture for a while, but I still said, ‘Why do bad things happen to good people?’

            And the pastor’s son told me, ‘Because sin is upon the earth.  God promises to be with you in your times of trial, Proffery.  But God can guide you through life’s hard times only if you are a born-again Christian.’

            ‘Why do good things happen to bad people?’ I then asked.

            ‘It is written, “…; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance?” Romans 2:4, Proffery,’ he said to me.  ‘God’s goodness can convince a lost sinner to seek Christ as Saviour.’

            I went on to say, ‘Good things happen to good people, also.  And bad things happen to bad people, too.’

            ‘My Good Lord’s perfect love is called “agape love,”’ said Pastor’s son.  ‘It is love that does not expect love to be given back.’

            ‘How can I give the true God love back for him?’ I asked.

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            ‘By asking Him into your heart as Your own personal Saviour.’ said Pastor’s son.  ‘The Saviour can save you from Hell forever, and He can save you for Heaven forever.  This is Jesus’s promise for all who become born-again Christians.’

            ‘I want to be born again right now, O pastor’s son,’ I said.

            And right then, there at school, he led me through the sinners’ prayer unto my own so great salvation.  I then said to him, ‘God bless you.  And thank you.’

            And he told me, ‘God bless you, Proffery.  Thank you for letting me pray with you.’

            That, O good fellow shippers here, was how I became born again into the family of God,” said Proffery.

            Gravel spoke and glorified God, saying, “How great it is to be a Christian and living for God.”

            Just then her griffin Valiant broke in and did ask her, “Mistress, you speak as if you are one of them.”

            All four believers were mortified by such a statement.  Gravel asked him, “Valiant, did I say something wrong?”

            To this Valiant said, “You and Proffery should talk, my errant mistress.”

            Proffery, Gravel’s boyfriend asked, “Is it something that I and Gravel did that causes you doubts about us, Valiant?”

            Gallant also dared to confront his mistress Carol in chastisement, saying to her, “The same goes for you and your boyfriend Flanders, too, O Mistress.”

            ‘What did we do?” asked Carol, mystified by such disrespect from her beloved pet.

            Flanders said, “Gallant, if I and my girlfriend did something wrong, tell us what it is.”

            Gallant replied curtly, “It is not for a pet griffin to say.”

            And Valiant said tersely, “Such should not be spoken of between any mistress and her griffin.”

            Never before had there arisen such discord among these six so bonded in the Holy Spirit.

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A schism had come between griffins and Christians.  And the six thereupon left this backyard to go back to their homes. Today’s fellowship had ended in a fight.

            Another few days passed, and the six gathered for fellowship again.  This time they met at Carol’s place, out in the side yard.  Hurt feelings shown in the eyes of the mistresses to their griffins.  And judgment shown in the eyes of the griffins toward their mistresses.  And none of the four believers could tell what the problem was.  Only the griffins seemed to know.  And they were not speaking here in the side yard,

            Trying to alleviate this strain among the group right now, Carol asked, “Would anybody like to listen to how I got saved?”

            The three other believers nodded their heads and said, “Yes.”  The two griffins gave a slight nod of the head in an unspoken, “Yes.”

            And Carol told the testimony of her salvation:  “You all know how I loved cheer leading and how I always wear my old cheerleader uniform every day.  Well, before I had my cheer leading uniform, I used to put on my witch hat.  I was a little girl who loved her black witch hat.  And I had it on every day that I could.  My favorite day of the year for me then was Halloween.  That was when I could go trick-or-treating and showing off to all the world my wonderful and cherished witch hat.

I saw myself dressed thus as ‘bewitching.’  Even my bag of Halloween candy I got from trick-or-treating was not so special to me as my witch hat.  Mom and Dad had bought it for me at a Halloween superstore when I was five years old, and when I fell in love with it, Mom and Dad regretted having bought it for me.  Not long later, I came up to Mom and Dad, and I said, ‘When I grow up, I want to be a witch.’  Mom right away grounded me.  Dad confiscated my witch hat.  And I was so sorry for myself.  And I cried.  Later, Dad got alone with me to talk to me about what I said.  He told me that witchcraft was a work of the Devil himself.  He told me that witchcraft was of the occult.  And he told me that neither he nor my mom approved of a daughter of theirs becoming a witch.  I did not

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understand what he was saying to me about this Devil and about this occult.  I did not know anything about being a witch except that witches wore witch hats.  I told Dad that I just loved the hat.  I loved the broad brim.  I loved the cone at the top.  And I loved the color. I told all of this to him, and I was telling the truth from my heart.  He heard me out.  Then he gave me back my witch hat.  That was the happiest thing that happened for me back in my young days second only to the day I first found my witch hat.   And I said to Mom and Dad, ‘I shall not become a witch.  I promise.’  And we three all hugged.  But, needless to say, when I got a little older, I became curious about witchcraft.  And I went to the library and secretly looked for books about witchcraft.  I was so convicted of sin, and I was not even saved yet then.  Maybe lost people can tell when they are doing something bad, too.  I found one particularly big book that was called “Good Witches and Bad Witches.”  I had to read this and look at the pictures.  But I had to do it where no one could see me.  I could not read this in a public library.  I could not go and check this book out in front of the librarian.  I had to take it home and read it in privacy in my room.  I did not think long before I decided to steal it out of the library to keep for myself in my room.  And that I began to do.  I sneaked out of the library with this big book in both hands, and I began to walk home, carrying it in both arms.  Let me tell you—it was one of the biggest books of all the shelves.  And way before I got home, I had to let it fall to the ground, because it was too heavy for a little girl to carry around.  And I went and called Dad to take me home.  I thought to hide the book on witches in my blue jean jacket.  Dad came.  Dad saw the book in my jacket.  Dad found out that I was stealing.  And Dad brought the book back and apologized to the librarian.  And I got the spanking of my life from Mom.  Then my parents had the pastor come over, and they had a prayer meeting for me.  I did not know that until later.  But God answered their prayer.  And God acted.

And He struck my black witch hat.  What happened to my black witch hat that God smote?  I’ll tell you.  He made the cone to always crumple down and fall to the side all of a sudden.  All of a sudden I started having to try to keep the cone up.  For my witch hat to be what I wanted it to be, the cone had to

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be up, straight up, and stay that way.  I tried putting a sheet of paper in the witch hat to keep it up.  I tried pieces of newspaper put in there.  I tried magazines.  And I tried parts of cereal boxes. I even tried

a dish towel.  But my cone kept falling down!  This T.L.C. with which I then had to tend to my witch hat made my witch hat an inconvenience.  That’s right.  My black witch hat became a hassle.  And I said to God, Whom I had not yet known then, ‘What a bother my witch hat is, Lord!’  That was a murmur.  And I gave up my black witch hat.  I threw it out in the garbage can out in the stable.  And I stood by it until the time came to bring the garbage can to the road side.  And I did that.  And I stood by the garbage can until the garbage men came.  And they came.  And I watched as they dumped the garbage can into the wagon.  And I could tell.  It was done.  There was no turning back.  And there was never to come a new one.  And I cried out to God, ‘What am I going to do now?’  Behold three men coming up in suits and ties and holding Bibles.  They were from the Baptist church in town, and they were out giving out the Word of God, seeking lost souls to win for Christ.  All of a sudden, just like that, I understood that God had sent these men to me, in answer to my prayer about what there was for me to do in life for now on.  I listened to these men; they told me about the Saviour; and they led me through a prayer.  I got born again.  And Jesus took over my life after the going away of my witch hat.

That was how I became a believer.”

            “Chapeau de sorcière,” said Flanders.  “Witch hat in French.”

            “Sombrero de bruja,” said Proffery.  “Witch hat in Spanish.”

            “Hexen Hut,” said Gravel.  “Witch hat in German.”

            “Witch hat,” said Carol, with a grin.  “Witch hat in English.”

            Then her griffin Gallant now spoke, and he said, “My mistress thinks her sins ended when she gave up her witch hat and got saved.”

            And Valiant now said, “The sinner cannot see his or her own sin.”

            Flanders then said, “Griffins, if you have something to say, tell me.”

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            Proffery said, “I want to know.”

            Gallant said, “You men are just as guilty as are our mistresses.”

            Valiant said, “Our mistresses started it.  You men finished it.”

            “What did I do?” asked Gravel.

            “Is it something that I did not do?” asked Carol.

            “Numbers 32:23, Mistress,” said Gallant.

            “’…:  And be sure your sin will find you out,’ my mistress,” said Valiant the Bible verse.

            “Griffins, you provoke God,” said Proffery.

            “And you test mistress and boyfriend,” said Flanders.

            The two griffins then turned their backs to their mistresses and their mistresses’ boyfriends.

            Valiant said, “We are leaving now.”

            And Gallant said, “We will come back later.”

            And having said this, the two griffins flew away on into the horizon.  And the four Christians spoke not, but searched much.  But none of them could come up with a reason why the two griffins thus betrayed their mistresses so staunchly.  And then they had a little prayer meeting.  Then they left and went home.

            It was a week later.  The griffin pets had not yet come back home to their mistresses.  And Gravel had the bunch over for Christian fellowship in her side yard.  And there was eerie silence in this fellowship with the griffins not here to enjoy Christ with them.  Carol spoke and said, “Maybe you can tell us how you got saved, too, Gravel.”

            “I’d be honored to,” said Gravel.  And she gave the testimony of her salvation:  “I had a belief about my eternal destiny that I did not get from reading the Bible.  The Bible says that when a believer passes away in this life, he goes immediately to Heaven to be with the Lord.  And the Bible also says that when an unbeliever passes away in this life, he goes immediately to Hell to be in the fires.  Well,

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what I thought before I found out the truth, was that everybody who dies, becomes an angel in Heaven.

So, I assumed that my eternal destiny was as an angel of Heaven.  I did not know that what a person does about Christ in this life is the determining factor about where he spends eternity in the life to come.  The body in Hell is an indestructible corruptible body.  The body in Heaven is an indestructible incorruptible body.  All who die will have a physical body in the afterlife.  In my beliefs, when I would be an angel in Heaven, I was going to be ‘this cloud drifting through nirvana in bliss and contentment.’

I spoke to all of my friends that I was destined to become a she-angel, and they all believed me.  The more I thought upon this, the greater became my desires for Heaven.  And for Christmas, I got for a present, a big book called ‘Angelic Hierarchy.’   And I at once began to read it.  It told of good angels and evil angels.  And I found out that there were different levels of angels.  I read of cherubim and of seraphim and of archangels and of dominions and of thrones and of powers and of principalities.  And I read of transporting angels and of messenger angels and of fighting angels and of worshiping angels.

And I read of Lucifer, the angel who became the Devil.  And I read of Michael, the angel who protected God’s chosen nation Israel.  And I read of Gabriel, who stood before God.  Everything was going along for me so well when I was learning all about what I would become as an angel like one of them in this book. But then the hammer fell, guys.  This book said that angels are accounted as males.  It claimed that none of the angels were accounted as females.  There were only he-angels.  There were no such things as she-angels.  Where did that leave me?  Maybe I was not to become an angel after all.  Where was I going to end up in the afterlife?  It might not be Heaven after all.  Maybe I was going to end up down in Hell.  If I was wrong about angels, maybe I was wrong about Heaven, too.  I kept on reading this Angelic Hierarchy, and it had a chapter on the saints in Heaven who worshipped God with the angels.  It said that the saints in Heaven were both males and females.  Though the angels were all males, the saints were both genders.  I could still be a ‘she’ Up in Heaven, but as a person in her physical self walking and talking with Jesus.  That was good for me to read.  And I was glad then not to

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become like an amorphous vapour in Paradise.  Being a girl in Heaven now sounded happier to me

than being a spirit in Heaven. And this book kept talking about the angels and the saints falling down before Jesus the Lord on His throne and worshiping Him.  I did not know what that had to do with Heaven.  I just wanted to go to Heaven, because it was the happiest place in the universe.  And the more that I read about the real Heaven, the worse it started sounding to me yet lost in my sins.  And then the book claimed the most provocative and shocking truth about Heaven that I had never heard about before.  It said that Heaven would be a miserable place for those without Christ.  This was myself, without Christ. It said that any person who died in his sins would never be happy in Heaven.

This was myself, living in my sins.  It said that the wicked person’s least favorite thing to do is to worship Christ, and in Heaven, everybody gladly and adoringly worships Christ.  This was myself, a wicked person who did not care for Christ.  It also said that if God did allow the unsaved sinners into Heaven, that then sin would come into Heaven, and thereby it would make Heaven no better than Earth.  It said that God allowed only saved sinners into Heaven, the saved thus declared righteous by the shed blood of Christ on the cross.  These were the born-again people.  They loved God in this life, and they would love God in the life to come.  I was unsaved.  I was lost.  I was not born again.  I did not love Christ.  I did not have Heaven waiting for me as I had always thought to have.  And even if I did go there, myself in my sins, I would hate it There.  Who had ever heard of such a thing as being

vexed and troubled in Heaven?  I was going to Hell in my sins, and I knew it then.  I kept reading ‘Angelic Hierarchy.’   And I came to the epilogue.  And there in the back of this book was what the author called ‘the sinners’ prayer.’  He said that if a person prays this sample prayer and means it from the heart that then he or she can go to Heaven, too, and never have to go to Hell.  Though I was now disillusioned about the Glory of Heaven, I knew how very much worse that Hell would be for a wicked girl like myself.  And I first came to desire the worship of Christ in my heart—both down here in this life and Up There in the life to come.  Indeed Hell in its torments of fire and brimstone were so

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terrible.  Heaven and the throne of God sounded so good for me now.  I then wanted to go to Heaven  and to fall down in worship of Jesus on His throne.  And I went and repented.  And I prayed this sample sinners’ prayer in the back of the book.  And this is what it said:  ‘Dear God.  I am a sinner. It’s my fault, and I am sorry for that.  Because I sin I will go to Hell.  But you love me.  You want me to go to Heaven.  You sent Your only begotten Son Jesus Christ to die on the cross for my sins.  And this same Jesus rose back to life on the third day.  Please become my Saviour.  And please give me eternal life.  Thank You.  In Jesus’s name I pray.  Amen.’   Behold, I found the real Heaven now my everlasting destiny, and I wanted to go There and see God.  I found the Saviour of the world now in my heart.  That is how I became a born-again believer.”

            Carol said, “I wish that my Gallant were here with us to hear those good news.”

            “Would that Valiant were here with his mistress,” said his mistress Gravel.

            “This is the first time that the griffins were not here with us in our fellowships,” said Proffery.

            “Maybe it is good now for a while that they be not here with us,” said Flanders.

            Lo, in came in the air the two griffin pets.  Gallant lighted upon the ground to his mistress’s left hand side.  And Valiant also lighted along the left side of his mistress.  They were late.

            Carol spoke to her griffin friend, saying, “Welcome, my Gallant.”  She felt guilty over what she did not know about what he knew.  Gallant spoke not right now.

            Gravel said, “Good friend Valiant, come and join us if you would.”  Gravel felt convicted of sins that only he knew about.   She could not tell what was bothering him so much about her.  He said nothing.

            Then Flanders said, “Maybe it is time for you rebels to tell us what is on your mind.”

            “This game must end,” said Proffery.

            The two griffins looked at each other.  Gallant said, “We are leaving now, mistress.”

            And Valiant said, “And this time we are not coming back, O mistress.”

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            Having come to say, “Good-bye,” the two griffin pets, lifelong best friends with their mistresses, flew off most unceremoniously.  The four believers, distraught and forsaken, watched the griffins in the sky until they could see them no more.  And Carol stood there weeping.  Flanders came up to her and held her in his arms and shared her grief with her.  And Gravel laid her head upon Proffery’s shoulder, and she cried.  Proffery held her and comforted her with the truth, “God will never leave us or forsake us.”

            A few weeks later, the four Christians traveled to the North of the North.  This was the most north place of all these Griffin Lands.  Any farther north than here, one was quite literally beyond the world.  Here was where land met ice.  This ice was off of this northern edge of the Griffin Land.  And the four believers, in their winter attire, stood here and gazed out upon this endless ice.

            Gravel spoke and said, “Folklore tells us that Heaven is out there where that ice ends.  The Bible says that Heaven is in the sides of the north.”

            Proffery said, “That’s in Isaiah 14:13.”

            Flanders said, “My pastor says that Heaven is out there right above us beyond the farthest star of the universe.”

            “Very far away,” said Carol.

            “Whether due north or straight up, Heaven is a Paradise of neither sin nor temptation,” said Proffery.

            “And a Haven without trials and without testings,” said Carol.

            “Without sickness and without death,” said Gravel.

            “And without the Devil and without his demons,” said Flanders.

            “Our great Theophany had come to these Griffin Lands from that Heaven,” said Gravel.  “He came; he created Grande Prairie; and he sat down in Grande Prairie to rule in His most divine Goodness and for our own good.”

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            “Grande Prairie, a little Heaven in a big Griffin Land,” said Carol.

            “I’m glad for that,” said Flanders.

            “It is good to have God down here in our Griffin Lands,” said Proffery.

            “I wish that my Gallant were here with us,” said Carol.

            “He was acting like a little devil,” said Flanders.  “Something got into his head.”

            “He was suddenly so different with me,” said Carol.

            “He was a good griffin gone bad,” said Flanders.

            “I still wish that my Valiant had not run amok as he did,” said Gravel.

            “I would expect trouble like that from a Gray Malevolent Griffin,” said Proffery, “but never from a Tawny Benevolent Griffin.”

            Gravel said, “Maybe someone filled his head with lies about us.”

            “Fie on the griffins if they believed the false accuser and not us,” said Proffery.

            “When we get to Heaven, we will forget,” said Flanders.  “It is written, ‘…:  and the former shall not be remembered, nor come into mind.’  Isaiah 65:17.”

            “Amen!” said the four Christians in glory of God’s Word.

            A few weeks later after this, the four of God were standing upon the southernmost edges of the Griffin Lands.  This was called “the South of the South.”  All were in their traditional summer clothes here in the warm climate.  “Ah, fellow Christians,” said Flanders about this place, “We are now where land meets sea.”

            “One step off of these Griffin Lands means one step off of this world,” said Proffery.

            “Legends have it that Hell is beyond the edges of this sea way beyond,” said Gravel.

            “Pastor thinks that Hell is straight down below deep way way underground.” said Carol.

“We four know geology.  Underneath the crust of our world is a place called the mantel.  It is hot in the mantel.  Burning hot.  And underneath the mantle is the core of our world.  That is much hotter–fiery

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hot in fact.  Scientists say that this core is made up of molten magma.  What can be hotter than that? Hence the fires of Hell that our pastor talks about.  Hell must be deep below the surface of our world in the core in the underground lava.”

            “Hell could be down south or straight down,” said Flanders.  “I’m just glad that I will not have to spend even one second in Hell.”

            Proffery said, “The lake of fire indeed, Brother,”

            “I know that my Gallant will never have to go there, nor Valiant,” said Carol.  “Griffins have no souls as we people do.  After they pass away, they are forever gone.”

            “And I know that my Valiant will never get to go to Heaven, either, Carol, because he has no soul, just like Gallant,” said Gravel.  “He will not be for forever like us people.”

            “Animals like griffins return to the dust from where they had come,” said Flanders.

            “It is called the doctrine of ‘annihilism,’” said Proffery.  “What is true for animals is not true for  people.”

            “Like with dogs and cats,” said Flanders.

            “They die and return to the ground as well,” said Proffery.

            “I miss my Gallant,” said Carol.

            “And I grieve over Valiant,” said Gravel.

            “Let’s go back home to Centro,” said Proffery.

            “Yes.” said Flanders.  “It is time to go back home.”

            And the four began their trip back to the center of these Griffin Lands.

            Behold, when the four travelers came back to their town, there were the two griffins, waiting for them, and standing by the gate to the city!

            The two mistresses at first were frightened.  But the griffins smiled upon their mistresses in kindness.  The mistresses, with misgivings, tested their pets, asking them, “Are you mad at me?”

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            And the griffins said, “No, O Mistress.  I ask you that you not be mad at me.”

            “Are you back?” asked the mistresses.

            “I am back,” said the griffins.

            “Will you stay?” asked the mistresses.

            “I will stay,” said the griffins.

            “I forgive you,” said the mistresses.

            “I am unworthy.  Thank you,” said the griffins.  And all four hugged and kissed and praised and thanked God.

            And Gallant and Valiant told the four good Christians their true tale:  The Most Dread Griffin had gotten alone with each of these two Tawny Benevolent Griffins of God.   And he had created a vision before Gallant that showed his very mistress Carol committing fornication with her boyfriend Flanders!   And as for Valiant, he had caused Valiant to dream a dream about his mistress Gravel also committing such immorality with Proffery her boyfriend!  It seemed so very real to the griffins, that they got together and mutually agreed to leave their mistresses for the cause of God.  They did not think first to pray to God before running off from the Christian group.  Afterwards, they did think upon this.  And they together went to Grande Prairie to share this troubling news with the Theophany.  He knew about this already, and He rebuked them for not having come to Him for Godly counsel first.

And the Grande Prairie Theophany said, “The Most Dread Griffin had tricked you both.  Your mistresses and their boyfriends did not sin against their bodies with each other.  Carol did not commit such a sin.  And Gravel did not do it, either.  All four have been falsely accused by the Devil.  Woe unto you both for believing in such outlandish lies.  Go back to your mistresses and ask if they can forgive you now for this so great betrayal by the both of you.” And this the griffins did.  And here they were now, all six completely reconciled and the group just as united as it always had been.

            “Let’s go to Grande Prairie right now, the six of us, to go and visit the Theophany,” said

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Flanders.

            “A pilgrimage!” agreed Proffery.

            “Amen!” said the bunch.  “Amen!”

            And they made their pilgrimage.

            All six knelt in worship before God on His throne in His field.  The Grande Prairie Theophany put His right hand upon Flanders’s head, and He said, “I am building you a mansion in Heaven that will await you when you get There.  It will be to your most great liking.  It will be basic, old-fashioned, full of wood and wooden floors, and with much windows.  When you move into it Up in Glory, you will run up the stairs in great joy and bliss never to be taken from you.  And that which will be so novel for you about this mansion will be novel for evermore.  And you will live forever after in this mansion.

And I will visit you there from time to time.  Thus is it written in John 14:1-3, My faithful Flanders.”

            Next the great and glorious Theophany put His right hand upon Proffery’s head.  And God said, “My good son Proffery:  I promise you a Heaven where there is no darkness. There shall be no night There.  Neither shall there be a sun or a moon or stars There.  As I am the light of the world, I shall also be the light of that Heavenly city New Jerusalem.  I will be the light that lightens Heaven.  I will be the glory that illuminates the new Heaven and the new Earth.  And I shall shine for the eternity that shall come to replace the temporal.  Light is Good.  Thus it is written in Revelation 21:22-27, my holy son.”

            Then God the Theophany put His right hand upon Carol’s head, and he said to her, “Blessed daughter, I will dine with you at the marriage supper of the Lamb in Heaven Above.  Your favorite three foods will be there for you—breaded frog legs and coffeecake and strawberry shortcake.  And also your next three favorite foods will be there for you—garlic bread and chocolate pie and French toast.  I will eat with you, Carol, and you will eat with Me.  Indeed all of the saints of all of the dispensations of the Griffin Lands will be eating this dinner with me.  And I will provide for drink all manner of coffee and of tea and of iced tea and of cocoa.  It is thus written in Revelation 19:9.”

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            Then the Grande Prairie Theophany put his right hand of blessing upon Gravel’s head.  And He said, “My daughter, I promise you the city of Holy Jerusalem to live in.  The bride of the Lamb will live there for eternity.  You and all the rest of the church are the bride.  I am the Lamb.  And you will be a part of the marriage of the Lamb.  This New Jerusalem will have walls great and high.  And in these four walls will be twelve gates—each wall having twelve gates.  Each gate will have one angel.  And each gate will have written on it one of the names of the twelve tribes of Israel, my chosen nation.  Underneath this wall will be twelve foundations of all manner of jewels.  And in each foundation of gems will be one of the names of the twelve Apostles of the Lamb, My disciples.  And the gates shall be pearls, and the streets will be gold.  My Gravel, it is written such in Revelation 21:10-21.”

            Then the Theophany reached out both hands toward the two griffins, and He put one hand on one griffin’s head and the other hand on the other griffin’s head.  And the Grande Prairie Theophany said, “O gallant Gallant, O valiant Valiant, your mistresses and their boyfriends shall be leaving you soon.  They will be raptured to Heaven.  And all of these Griffin Lands will endure my wrath in its darkest hour in the imminent tribulation.  But you two most Tawny Benevolent Griffins shall stay here in this Paradise of Grande Prairie with Me.  Nothing from outside of this Grande Prairie shall come into this Grande Prairie.  Where I sit and rule is a Heaven.  And you will joy and rejoice in this holy refuge with your Theophany for the rest of your lives.”  Then the Theophany drew back his hands.

            Then the Grande Prairie Theophany spoke and said, “My children, the inner circle of My Apostles when I walked around the holy land—Peter and James and John—saw me in the mount of the transfiguration and in the garden of Gethsemane and in the synagogue ruler’s house.  To them only did I grant the privilege of seeing me transfigured into great brightness and supernatural glory upon a mountain, of sharing my great sorrows in a garden before my imminent crucifixion on the cross, of raising back to life the daughter of Jairus, a leader of a flock of Jews, in his own house.  Verily, verily, you six shall now see Me do greater deeds than these.  Behold, I make all things new.  Behold, I

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shall put down all evil.  Behold, the great and terrible day of the Lord.”

            Thereupon the Theophany of Grande Prairie called forth, “Gabriel, come to Me.”

            Lo, the angel Gabriel came down to this prairie from Heaven Above.  He lighted, furled in his great wings, and knelt before the Theophany on His throne.  “My Lord,” said Gabriel, “I await Your directive.”

            And the Theophany said, “I have a message for you to convey to the Most Dread Griffin.”

            “Your humble messenger angel awaits Your message, O Sovereign Over All,” said Gabriel.

            “Tell that Devil, ‘Verily your time is up,’” said the Theophany.

            “Your will be done, O Most High,” said Gabriel.  And he unfurled his wings and flew off to tell the message to Satan.

            Then the Theophany summoned forth him who was to come next, saying, “Michael, come to Me.”

            And, indeed, another angel of God came flying down from above and lighted before the throne in subjection and honor.  This must have been Michael, the warrior angel.  On his knees before God, Michael, God’s strongest angel said, “My Theophany, how can I serve You today?”

            And the Grande Prairie Theophany said, “I have a task for you, Michael.”

            “Ask of me, and it will be done, O Jesus,” said Michael the angel.

            “Bring to me right now the Most Dread Griffin,” said the Theophany.

            “My Most High, he is bigger and stronger than myself,” said Michael.

            “Take with you your fellow angel soldiers Force and Power and Strength and Might,” said the Theophany.

            “That I shall, O Maker,” said Michael.  “We five shall grab the Most Dread Griffin and overpower him and bring him through the air unto You.”

            “Michael, make Godspeed,” said the Grande Prairie Theophany. “”After I make judgment this

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day, I shall make grace.”

            “I hear, and I obey, O Theophany,” said Michael.  And he lifted back up into the skies above Grande Prairie and did fly away to do his work for the Lord.

            An interim passed.  The two men waited in expectations.  The two women waited in wonder.  The two griffins waited in faith.  And Gabriel came flying back.  And he said, “It is done, my good Theophany.  Your messenger angel has delivered the message.”

            “Well done, Gabriel,” said the Theophany.

            Another interim passed.  Flanders and Proffery waxed confident in this while.  Carol and Gallant were eager and a little nervous.  Gravel and Valiant knew that big things were happening.

Then there came clamor and din and voices from the skies..  And Michael and his four angels came flying in with the biggest and strongest griffin that the men and women of God here had ever seen.

But Gallant and Valiant had seen this griffin before.  And the griffin pets said to their four fellow pilgrims here in Grande Prairie, “This is the Most Dread Griffin.”

            And this Gray Malevolent Griffin of Gray Malevolent Griffins was forced down to the ground underneath five good angels before the throne of the Theophany.

            Michael said to the Theophany, “He is here, my Lord.”

            This Theophany went on to say, “Good job, Michael, and you four other angel soldiers.  You may release him now.  He will not escape Me.”  And the five good angels got up off from the chief evil angel.  And he stood up proudly before the Theophany on His throne.

            The prideful Most Dread Griffin spoke and said, “O Grande Prairie Theophany, fall down and worship me.”

            Having sovereign power over all of His creation, the Grande Prairie Theophany spoke and said, “Most Dread Griffin, it is written, ‘Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, in the sides of the pit.’  Isaiah 14:15.”

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            Behold, suddenly the Most Dread Griffin came on fire!  Flanders and Proffery reveled in glory over this putting down of all evil for ever thus.  Carol and Gravel were at first shocked, but they both were glad that Lucifer’s malicious deeds came back on him in this final judgment.  And Gallant and Valiant spoke and said, “’For the day of the Lord is near upon all the heathen:  as thou hast done, it shall be done unto thee: thy reward shall return upon thine own head.’  Obadiah 15.”

            And the Most Dread Griffin perished where he fell.

            “What happened?” asked the griffin mistresses to their boyfriends.

            And the boyfriends said to their girlfriends, “Lucifer is now in the lake of fire.”

            Behold, Michael and his four fellow soldiers and Gabriel and Flanders and Proffery and Carol and Gravel were suddenly snatched up to Heaven in a taking up to the clouds.  Indeed also all of the other born-again Christians, dead or alive, of all the Griffin Lands of its many years of history were raptured up with the four believers of this Griffin Lands Mythology Trilogy thus written.  The Griffin Lands also were purged of all of the Gray Malevolent Griffins.  And now only the Tawny Benevolent Griffins remained in the Griffin Lands…and men and women and children.  And the tribulation upon the world of sin began.  And Gallant and Valiant were spared the tribulation, themselves now beginning their new lives here–though without their loving mistresses, but with the compassionate Theophany here in His and their Grande Prairie.

            And Grande Prairie experienced the Shechinah Glory, and all in Heaven down here and in Heaven Up There began to worship the Theophany with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, making a joyful noise unto God.  And the two griffin pets found a happiness in Christ that exceeded even the happiness they had with their adoring and adored mistresses.

            Maranatha!

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