Flaurie Malo Alvers, a country girl becoming a city woman, discovers a women’s one-piece swimsuit in which to jump in and splash around in the waters. But this maillot that starts out to be a wonder to her, goes on to become a fetish to her, then grows on to become an addiction to her, then grows on to become a false idol to her. Her two new pool friends—the born-again believers Flanders and Meghan—seek to lead her to salvation with her in her women’s maillot.
THE WOMEN’S ONE-PIECE SWIMSUIT
By Mr. Morgan P. McCarthy
Her name was “Flaurie Malo Alvers.” And she was a country woman becoming now a city woman. At eighteen years of age, she had just moved out of Mom and Dad’s house and begun life on her own in an apartment. She had come from the sticks of Michigan’s Upper Peninsula, and she was now in the residential section of east De Pere on Lewis Street in an upper apartment all for herself. It was yet hot summer in Wisconsin near the middle of August, Wisconsin’s second hottest month of the year. And Flaurie at once began once again to wonder where a woman could go and jump in the water and splash around and cool down. Miss Alvers’s favorite pastime was always to jump into the lake and have the time of her life in the warm water under the sun. All of her life at home, with almost a thousand acres of yard, Flaurie had such isolation that not one person who was not Mom and Dad ever came upon this lake here and see her in her diversions. Her privacy in the country was unbroken in all eighteen years of her life as a girl at home in her days in the lake and upon its sandy shore. And Miss
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Alvers, even at eighteen, had no qualms about taking it all off and enjoying her times in the lake quite bare and then coming back out of the lake. No one was anywhere near who could see her in her uncovered state. She would take off her blue jeans and plaid blouse and her inner clothes and set them upon the shore; then she would live her free country life in her Mom and Dad’s lake with a spree all by herself; then she would come back out of the lake, dry herself off with a towel, and put back on her inner clothes and her outer clothes. And she would continue on with her good day here in her many good days in the countryside at home.
But now Flaurie Alvers lived in the city with many other people. De Pere’s population was over 25,000. She had to accept the fact that she could no longer do in her new life what she had used to do in her old life. Decency and modesty and propriety made jumping in and splashing around in the water impossible for her in this suburban place she lived in now. She began to think now in her first day on Lewis Street: Surely the people of De Pere must have a lake or two in which to enjoy as people could.
Maybe there might be a pond or a river or a creek where others played in the water in days like today.
They would not go bare, of course. Did they go into the water in all of their street clothes? What if there were a type of clothes that were meant for people to get wet in the water? Was there a garment that men and women put on just for waters? Flaurie had never known of such a thing as this. The city had lots of surprises for herself. She was excited. If there were an apparel just for swimming, then Flaurie could continue on in the city with what she so enjoyed in the country. Just imagine, she could frolic in the water, and still have clothes on—swimming apparel—whatever that might be.
It was seven o’clock now at night. The evening was drawing toward sunset. And Flaurie, her living room windows open to the east, thought to hear the sound of people playing and having fun. The games sounded to be very nearby, like maybe a couple blocks away. And Miss Alvers leaped off of her living room sofa to go find this pleasant activity and to find out about city life in De Pere for her first time. Once outside in her yard, she stood at the corner of Lewis Street and Erie Street. Going east, she
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then walked one block down Lewis Street to its end, intersecting with Huron Street. And she saw to the left just beyond a house or two, what she was hearing. It looked to be one of those parks that cities had. She had heard of parks, but had never been to one. Turning left and walking a short distance north down Huron Street, she came to the park stretching far to her right. She saw a sign that read, “Legion Park.” And Flaurie Alvers wondered what great things might happen for her here in her first day in the big city. And Flaurie stepped out upon this real park.
Behold, a little waters that had to have been man-made! It was queer and odd and new to Flaurie. And it was smaller than any lake and bigger than any pond. The sign read, “Legion Park Pool.” It was getting dark outside now. Just then bright overhead lights turned on. And this pool was now lit up with big lamp lights around the pool. Indeed these lights shining upon this pool with darkness just beyond turned this new discovery for Flaurie into an enchanted land of magic. And there were revelers in the water in attire that Flaurie Alvers had never imagined before. Herself, being a young woman, Flaurie looked first of all upon all of the guys. For this “pool,” as it was called, the men wore short pants that were baggy and practical and reached not far down their legs. She gazed upon the men with a lonely woman’s admiration. They were all so handsome, and they were all desirable in their swimming apparel. Then, herself being a woman and very inquisitive with a personal curiosity, Flaurie looked upon the women to see what their swimming apparel might be here in this pool. These such attire would be for herself to put on maybe someday. And Miss Alvers saw all manner of women’s swimming clothes in a great diversity of colors and cuts of the cloth and patterns.
There seemed to be two main styles of pool clothes for her gender. Some were made of one piece. And some were made of two pieces. The one-piece swimwear covered all from neck to crotch, with shoulder straps or strings over the shoulders, and with their arms all bare, and with their legs all bare, and with everything that should be covered quite decently covered, both front and back. Flaurie Alvers
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at once liked these the best of all. The two-piece swimwear showed all but the most private—both for the top and for the bottom. A skimpy piece on top just barely covered the breasts, and this top piece was held together some with strings and some with straps. A skimpy piece on the bottom covered
the most private parts and not much more, some with strings and some with straps. In these a woman showed off not only all of her arms and all of her legs, but also all of her midriff and belly and a little below that. And as much as her front was for all to see, so, also was her back for all to see, top to bottom, with her bottom covered in a type of swimsuit pant. Flaurie did not like these two-piece swimsuits for herself. And the boys wore men’s swimsuits meant for boys. And the girls wore women’s swimsuit meant for girls.
Flaurie looked out upon this brave new pool with great wonder. So, this was what people wore in the water. They were meant just to get wet. These swimsuits were for pools, and they were for lakes. And they were different for men and for women. And they made the women look slimmer; and the men, stronger. And they were meant for children and for adults. And Flaurie, never having prayed to God before, prayed to a God Whom she knew not, “Lord, could I have a one-piece swimsuit for my own someday?” Flaurie Malo Alvers had found a fetish. She pined for a maillot now with all of her desires. She wanted to wear it dry, and she wanted to wear it wet. She would never be unhappy again.
Just then a friendly and pleasant woman’s voice called forth to Flaurie. “Hi, there, miss.”
Flaurie looked to see who it was who wanted to talk to her, a stranger to this pool. And she saw a young woman about her age dressed in a one-piece swimsuit that had alternating black and white V-stripes running across and down her front and back. Shy, Flaurie said to this woman, “Hi there.” A chain-link fence around this pool and all, was between Flaurie and this woman.
“God be with you,” said this benevolent woman.
“Why, thank you,” said Flaurie.
“I saw you running up to here and stopping and looking,” said this woman. “You must not be
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from around here.”
“I came from the country,” said Flaurie.
“Welcome to the city,” said this Chevron-patterned one-piece swimsuit girl.
“What is that that you’re wearing?” asked Flaurie.
“Why, it’s a women’s one-piece swimsuit,” said the woman.
“That makes sense,” said Miss Alvers. “I have never seen anything like it before.”
“You are from very far away,” said this lady in friendship. “This is also called a ‘maillot.’”
“My middle name is ‘Malo,’” said Flaurie Alvers.
“”Is that ‘Malo’ as in ‘M-a-l-o?’” asked the young lady.
“Yes. It is,” said Flaurie. “Is your ‘maillot’ as in ‘m-a-i-l-l-o-t?’”
“Yes. It is,” said the one-piece swimsuit girl. Then she said, “My name is ‘Meghan.’ My brother is looking for a girlfriend.”
“My name is ‘Flaurie,’” said Miss Alvers. “I never had a boyfriend before. What’s his name?”
“His name is ‘Flanders,’” said Meghan.
“Does he have a swimsuit, too?” asked Flaurie.
“That he does,” said Meghan. “He’s not here tonight. But he comes here lots—even more than I do.”
“I would like to have a boyfriend if one would have me,” said Flaurie. “But after all that I have discovered here tonight in De Pere, I would like to have even more than a boyfriend a one-piece swimsuit of my own to wear.”
“I would be glad to tell Flanders that,” said Meghan.
“Would he like me less if you say that to him?” asked Flaurie.
“My brother and I are both born-again believers,” said Meghan. “Flanders is very understanding with us women. Believe me. I am his sister.”
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“Dad used to tell me, ‘Men are from Mars; women are from Venus,’” said Flaurie with a laugh.
“So true, Flaurie,” said Meghan. “God made men and women different from each other. Even the way we think is different. We women think with our heart, and the men think with their head.”
“We women are smaller than the men most of the time,” said Flaurie Alvers.
“God calls us women, ‘the weaker vessel,’” said Meghan. “He means that mainly in the emotional perspective.”
“Mom has a saying, too,” said Miss Alvers. “It goes like this: ’A man works from sunup to sundown, but a woman’s work is never done.’”
“Indeed, Flaurie. My Mom is a stay-at-home mom, and she works hard for the family all the day and night long. God sees being a housewife as a very noble calling,” said Meghan.
“My mom is a stay-at-home mom, too,” said Flaurie Alvers. “She’s a real hard worker.”
“God calls wives to be help meets to their husbands,” said Meghan. “That’s in Genesis 2:18.”
“A help meet?” asked Flaurie. “Is that also called ‘a helpmate?’”
“The one and the same,” said Meghan.
“That sounds like a full-time job and more,” said Flaurie.
“God is honored when born-again Christian wives and mothers do their daily duties,” said Meghan. “Theirs is a job with many hats.”
“Can us single women glorify God, too, Meghan?” asked Miss Alvers.
“Yes,” said Meghan. “But first you have to be born again.”
“I’m not born again,” said Miss Alvers.
“Oh, Flaurie, we need to get you saved,” said Meghan.
“Saved, so I can glorify the Lord,” said Flaurie.
“Saved, so you don’t have to go to Hell,” said Meghan.
“I’d hate to end up down there,” said Flaurie.
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Meghan went on to tell the Gospel to Flaurie—that the Lord Jesus Christ died for their sins and rose again the third day. Then, right after that, Flaurie asked her where she got her one-piece swimsuit. Meghan told her, and, right after, started preaching salvation to her. Then Flaurie asked her what size swimsuit she wore. Meghan told her, and, immediately after, resumed preaching the Saviour to her. Then Flaurie asked her what it felt like, wearing her maillot. Meghan told her and went right back to preaching Heaven-and-Hell to her. In the end, Meghan had to give up on Flaurie’s soul for now and to start talking about women’s swimwear. They talked about Flaurie’s new apartment and where it was. They talked about how both women were the same size. They talked about big department stores with great women’s swimwear racks. And Flaurie found out about J.C. Penney’s and Younker’s and Sears and Montgomery Ward and Shopko and K-Mart and the Boston Store and Elder Beerman and T.J. Maxx and Kohl’s and the White Store and Fleet Farm and Walmart and Target and Burlington Coats and all the thrift stores in the area, even a specialized little swimwear shop in west De Pere on the corner of Reid Street and Fourth Street. Then on the loudspeaker a voice said, “The pool is closing in ten minutes.” And Flaurie’s new friend had to go. With a promise one to another of seeing each other again here, the two women left Legion Park. And Flaurie skipped in delights on her one-and-one-half blocks back home. She loved all the swimsuits that she had seen at the Legion Park Pool tonight under the lights in the dark of night. She loved Meghan’s black and white one-piece swimsuit. And she now prayed to a God she knew not for a black and white one-piece swimsuit to call all her own.
She got up the next morning, put on her summer clothes, and went down the stairs to go to Legion Park, maybe to the pool again. But once she stepped outside to the front stoop, she saw a delivery driver there all in brown with a brown delivery truck. He had a package. It was a little cardboard box sealed with mailing tape. “Is this for me?” she asked.
He said, “It is if you are 815 Lewis Street Apartment Three.”
“That’s I,” she said. “What is it?”
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“I don’t know,” said the delivery man.
“Thank you, sir,” said Miss Alvers, and she took this box into her hands, and he left. Right away she sat down on her cement stoop and studied it. The mailing address was handwritten in wide point magic marker and was misspelled, reading, “Louis Street” instead of “Lewis Street.” As for the return address, it simply read, “From two new pool friends” in fine point magic marker. Then Flaurie went ahead to tear open this box. Therein was a white plastic bag reading, “Burlington Coat Factory of Green Bay.” She then went ahead and tore open this inner bag. And she pulled out its contents. Be still her woman’s heart! It was a real and brand new and traditional women’s one-piece swimsuit! It was all sleek black and glistening white. She took it by its shoulder straps and held it up before her eyes, and she looked upon it in almost sensuous gaze. Its pattern was different from Meghan’s maillot pattern. Its pattern was different from any of the maillot patterns that she had seen at the pool last night. It called out to her in its vintage femininity. Its pattern could be described the following way: white leaves with black veins; fields of black with tiny white dots; leaves of all white; sundry fields of solid black. It had two shoulder straps each about one inch wide, which widened and joined to form a V-Neck in the front. A shirring went down the front in the middle from top to bottom. The two sides of this one-piece swimsuit were curved sensually just like her own women’s sides of her self. Even the stitching of the threads excited this girl with her first swimsuit. And the crotch liner measured about three inches wide; she would be appropriately decent in this. She then turned this swimming suit onto its back where she sat, and she spread it out upon her lap. There she saw a high back, whose rest of this back side was stitched together in the middle top to bottom. This part down there would cover her modestly in her bottom. And at the very bottom of this swimsuit, between front and back, was a stitching across that aforementioned three-inch-width. This, all of this, was the outside of Flaurie’s new one-piece swimsuit. Now it was time to see what this one-piece swimsuit looked like inside. And she looked inside where she sat. Behold, all manner of evocative tan. There was a tan liner of one
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fabric covering the whole front inside the maillot, and there was a tan liner of another fabric covering the whole back inside of this same maillot. And there were also cups in the inside of this maillot that had to be probably for her own breasts; these swimsuit cups were also tan, and of a thicker and softer material than any other part that went into the making of this garment. And there was a tan elastic band inside right below both of these cups, a band that ran all the way from one side to the other. Flaurie did not take long to understand the wherefore to this. It was a most practical thing to have for women’s swimwear like this. Then she looked down into the most private places of this one-piece swimsuit inside. And she saw a piece of clear plastic that didn’t seem to belong to this attire. She looked at it and read in black letters, “Hygienic liner. Remove after purchasing.” And she peeled it off from this crotch liner and set it down upon the porch beside her. There. That was better now. And she saw, where this extra appurtenance had been, a little extra tan liner that did belong to this apparel. This, too, had to be for practical purposes for women. The makers of this one-piece swimsuit thought of everything. Now Flaurie Alvers knew all about the insides of women’s maillots.
Then she discovered the tags that went with such swimsuits. There were two of them inside this swimming suit. And they were there, both sewn in upon the left side of this garment right along the outer edge of the left swimsuit cup within. The one swimsuit tag was black with words on its front side. It read on top in white letters, “Maxine,” and on the bottom in blue letters, “of Hollywood.” The second tag was white with black letters on both sides. The tag’s front side read the following:
“RN #73156
self
82% nylon/nilon
18% elastane/elastano
lining/forro
85% nylon/nilon
15% elastane/elastano
100% polyester/
poliester
style/estilo: MM3ME205
cut—corte: 030738
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size/talla
10
made in China
over for care
cuidado al reverso”
And the tag’s back side read the following:
“Hecho en China
estilo: MM3ME205
hand wash cold
dark colors
separately
only non-chlorine
bleach when needed
line dry do not iron
lavar a mano con
agua fria colores
obscuros por
separado
use solo blanqueador
sin cloro si es
necesario
secar colgado
no planchar”
In adoration, Flaurie put this swimsuit up against her face and felt its material across her cheek. It was sleek and shiny. Cherishing this prize, she stood up and held this maillot against her front side as women do with new clothes. She could tell from this that it would fit her perfectly. In mystery she put this brand new one-piece swimsuit to her nose, and she discovered the unique smell of a maillot right off of the rack. She thanked these two benefactors, whoever they were, for this most mesmerizing present. Flaurie would put this on for jumping in and splashing around in the water for the rest of her life. And there was never to be any turning back for this woman. This surprise package officially marked the end of her old life and the start of her new life. This women’s maillot was the biggest thing that ever happened to Flaurie Alvers. And this women’s one-piece swimsuit was her answer to life. Why was she here? To wear this swimming suit. And without any more waiting, Flaurie Malo Alvers
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went upstairs to her apartment and put on this extra special maillot. And she was aroused unto female stimulation by this women’s one-piece swimsuit.
And at once she went outside to show off her new self to the world. And she went looking for another park in town for all the world to see her like this. And she found one park whose sign read, “Voyageur Park.” This looked like a beautiful park. And there was the Fox River. And there were the people, looking at her and smiling in kindness. And here she was—the song, “Georgie Girl” in her heart—showing off her new maillot with herself in it.
And, as soon as she stepped out onto the green grass of the park, she got her first compliment.
A young man driving a car down the little road of this park passed her and called forth to her, “Nice swimsuit!”
“Thank you, sir,” she called back. Nobody before had given Flaurie Alvers so great a compliment as this stranger did for her just now.
She then climbed a little hill in the main part of this park and stood there, looking down toward the river off to the west and nearby. She put her arms akimbo, some of her fingers upon her swimsuit-covered hip and some of her fingers upon her bare hip, along both of her sides. And a young woman about her age and sitting on the middle bench of the three up here spoke and asked her, “What are you doing? Are you trying to catch a man?”
“I’m not sure, miss,” said Flaurie the truth.
“Dressed like that you are likely to find yourself a gentleman,” said this lady on the bench.
“I would not mind that,” said Miss Alvers. “Thank you.” And she continued on her walk.
She came up to the system of docks along the edge of Voyageur Park, and she saw three men in their twenties sitting in a motorboat next to the dock. They all saw her. One of them gave forth a strange provocative whistle at her that she had never heard before. Another of them said to her, “Oo là là!” And another said to her, “Whoa!”
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Naive, being a former recluse in the country, Miss Alvers asked them, “What does all of that mean?”
And the three answered in unison in explanation, “Looking good, girl!”
“Why, thank you, guys,” said Flaurie, and she went on her way, now walking upon the wooden boards of this dock.
Then, walking off of the dock here at its other end, she stepped back out upon the green grass of Voyageur Park. And then she came to a picnic table of people by the river. Here were a young woman and a young man and a pair of young twins about five years old, one a little boy and one a little girl. All four saw Flaurie just walking off of this dock, the little ones looking at her with big eyes. The little boy asked, “Mom, why is that lady wearing a swimsuit if she’s not swimming?”
And his mom said, “We ladies don’t have to be swimming just because we might have on a swimsuit.”
The little girl, young in her mind, also, went and asked pretty much the same thing again, asking, “Dad, why is the lady wearing a swimsuit on a walk?”
And his dad said pretty much the same answer already given, “Ladies do lots of different things in their swimsuits on hot days like today.”
Such curiosity about her new maillot pleased Miss Alvers to the uttermost. This talk about herself now duly flattered her. She said to them, “Good morning.”
And all four at the picnic table replied in good greeting, “Good morning.”
“Thank you all,” said Miss Alvers.
“You’re very welcome,” said all four.
And Flaurie continued on her way. She then found a cement trail that wound its way throughout this park, and she stepped out onto it in her bare feet and began to walk upon this path. And she passed a picnic shelter to her right. And she rounded two bends in this walkway at this farthest end of
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Voyageur Park and came to a group of three young ladies about her age, sitting in the grass near the northern edge of this park close to the river. These three were two-piece swimsuit girls. And Flaurie, the one-piece swimsuit girl, growing more and more confident in herself, came up to them and talked to them. She found out that they were college girls who went to St. Norbert College on the other side of the bridge. They found out that she had come from Upper Michigan. “You’re a yooper,” they told her in admiration, and they gladly welcomed her to join them. And she sat down among them, and they told her secrets about two-piece swimsuits that she had never known about. And she told them secrets about one-piece swimsuits that she had just learned this day for her first time. And all four young women all agreed that tankinis were not where it’s at for them. Then it was time for the college girls to get back to the dorm and study. They were in a summer session. She praised them their bikinis. And they praised her her maillot. And Flaurie got back up and resumed her walk down the walking trail of this park on her way back. And she came upon the other picnic shelter of this park. It was not being used. No one was under here. And there were lots of picnic tables all about upon the cement. She sat down at a picnic table under the roof on this day to relive these good times here this good day. Today was the first day of the rest of her life. And every day after today held an idyllic dream upon Flaurie’s heart as a young woman. She looked down upon her black and white maillot that covered her belly, and she put her right hand there, and she said to herself, “Flaurie, with this you will never be unhappy again.” And she looked upward toward Heaven in regard to the Good Lord.
Just then something fell from the ceiling upon her right eye. It felt like a bug. It seemed bigger than a gnat and smaller than a fly. And her eye hurt. She at once began to rub her eye with her right palm. She struggled and rallied and prevailed. And the bug came out. And her eye was free. And she looked upon what she had just extricated from her eye. There upon this picnic table was a dead crushed mosquito. Her eye still hurt. And it began to water much. And she could hardly see out of it right now. Did this mosquito sting her in her eye? And her bliss of happiness over her one-piece
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swimsuit was conquered by this distress of pain in her eye. She sat there long. She waited for it to get better. She grew fearful over her eyesight. Then she started to get better. The sting lost its sharpness.
The pain went away. Her eye stopped watering. Her eye could see again. And not long later, her right eye was just fine, as if nothing had happened to it. But her happiness over her new maillot did not come back right away. She waited in confidence. Still she did not find her precious happiness. She was worried. She called upon God for this joy to come back that she had finally found this morning.
It never came back. Her eye was good. Her one-piece swimsuit was good. Life was not good. Life was sad. And now her women’s one-piece swimsuit had lost its magic spell upon her. Yet, in the end, in this battle going on inside of her here in the picnic shelter alone with herself, Flaurie Alvers promised, “I shall never betray my maillot. Maillot of mine, it looks like it’s you and me alone together for the rest of my life. I found happiness in you. And I lost happiness in you.” Then she cried out, “What’s a woman got to do to find out what life is supposed to be about?” And her eyes let fall a few tears upon her cheek. And she sat there in a great depression for the rest of the morning into the early afternoon. Then she got up and walked back home, discouraged in her maillot. Something was missing in her life, and now she knew that. But what it was, she could not tell. She just knew that she was the most unhappy of women out there right now.
But Meghan and Flanders were happy.
Remembering this, Miss Alvers took hope for her return to the Legion Park pool for later on this day. This time she would be dressed for the pool, and she would be on the inside of the chain link fence, and she would be in the pool with her two Christian friends, and she would get to meet that fellow Flanders for her first time. This little hope took away much of her happiness let-down that had happened to her at Voyageur Park. And she kept her one-piece swimsuit on for this occasion.
And at the right time, Flaurie, the maillot girl, walked to Legion Park in approaching evening to jump into and to splash around in the pool. And there at the pool the one black-and-white one-piece
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swimsuit girl met the other black-and-white one-piece swimsuit girl.
“Flaurie,” called forth Meghan.
“Meghan,” called forth Flaurie.
“I see that you got what my brother sent you, girl. Looking good, Flaurie,” said Meghan.
“It was Flanders who gave me this?” asked Flaurie, lifting a shoulder strap in indication. And she now remembered that she had never stopped to think who it was from.
“Well, it was really from the both of us,” said Meghan.
“’From two new pool friends,’” said Flaurie, now remembering yesterday and the writing on the box.
“From me and Flanders,” said the Christian woman.
“Thank you! Thank you both!” said Miss Alvers.
“We went shopping at Burlington’s in Green Bay,” she said. “And when my brother and I found this one hanging on the rack, we knew that this was the one that you would absolutely fall in love with. He paid half. I paid half. It was our present to you, Flaurie. Does it make you happy?”
“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you both so much, O Meghan. I feel like I have found a brave new world, walking around like this,” said Flaurie Alvers.
“Do you like it?” asked Meghan.
“It’s the most exciting outfit that I have ever put on,” said Miss Alvers. “Now I never want to put on anything else but this.”
“We did good—Flanders and I,” said Meghan.
“Where is Flanders?” asked Miss Alvers. “Is he here?”
“He is coming,” said Meghan. “He will be here soon.”
“Do you think that he will like me?” asked Flaurie.
“I know my brother. I know what kind of women he finds attractive. He will like you a lot, O
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Flaurie,” said Meghan.
“It’s getting dark out here,” said Flaurie.
“The lights will come on anytime now,” said Meghan. Just then the pool lights went on for the night. “It’s eight o’clock now,” said Meghan.
“Let’s jump in,” said Miss Alvers.
“I’ll wait up for my brother just a bit,” said Meghan.
“A girl like me cannot wait up when it is time for her to get her one-piece swimsuit wet for her first time,” said Flaurie.
“He’ll be here anytime,” said Meghan.
“I have to do what my maillot tells me to do,” said Flaurie. And with this, she stepped down into the pool at its shallow end. Tentative and in anticipation, she waded out into the pool deeper until the water was almost to her nether regions. Indeed this first getting her maillot wet awaiting her now was almost as thrilling as having first put it on when it was dry first thing this morning. Funny. That seemed so long ago.
Just then Meghan called out, “My brother’s here now, Flaurie.”
But her desires would not wait. And she bypassed her would-be boyfriend for her date with this women’s one-piece swimsuit. And she waded out deeper, and her lowest parts of her maillot, front and back and in-between, got all wet. This was not enough. She wanted a little bit more. And she waded out deeper into the pool. And her belly and lower sides and all of her bottom got wet, now covered with wet maillot fabric down there. She needed a little bit more. And she got it, this time wading out deeper in this city pool to her breasts. Her whole front—swimsuit cups and all—was now covered with wet swimsuit material. And her lower back was covered with the same in like. She had to get more.
And she waded out deeper into the pool, right at the edge between the shallow end of the pool and the diving area of the pool. And now the water was up to her chin. Now even her shoulder straps were all
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wet and beneath the water. And to finish it off, she bent her knees and lowered her body and put her head beneath the water. And she straightened back up again. Now her whole women’s one-piece swimsuit was wet from top to bottom—outside and inside. And she came to feel that a wet maillot felt better even than did a dry maillot.
“Hello, Flaurie. Is that you?” called forth a gentleman’s voice.
Oh yeah. Flanders had come. He was her date for the evening. She looked and saw a cute guy in a man’s swimsuit of black and white diamonds. It was an argyle pattern indeed. “Flanders, is that you?” she called forth.
“He I am,” he said. “And I can tell that you are Flaurie.”
Meghan said, “I will leave you two alone for your date tonight.”
Flaurie climbed up out of the pool and stood before this handsome fellow of God. She was dripping before him. “Sorry that I am dripping, Flanders,” she said.
“Good Flaurie, that is what cement slabs around pools are for,” he said in good encouragement.
“Sorry for being late,” she said. “I had to find out new things about my one-piece swimsuit.”
“Ah, you do like it,” he said. “I and my sister were hoping that you would like it.”
As she stood, pondering the feel of her wet maillot now outside of the pool, Flaurie secretly knew that, for herself, a wet swimsuit in the water had felt even better than did a wet swimsuit out of the water.
Flanders then asked her, “What kinds of things did you find out there in the pool as I waited?”
“Well, right now, I can see that a women’s maillot can hug a girl even better than a guy can,” said Flaurie.
“Have you ever been hugged before by a real guy, Flaurie?” asked Flanders.
“No,” she said. “At least not yet, Flanders.”
“Have you ever been hugged in a one-piece swimsuit by a guy before, Flaurie?” he asked.
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“Is something like that for real?” she asked.
“Have you ever been hugged by a guy in a guy’s swimsuit?” he dared to ask her.
“That’s just make-believe, Flanders,” said Miss Alvers.
“You must be from far away,” he said to her in admiration.
“I guess that I have come from what people call a ‘sheltered childhood,’” she said.
“Would you like me to become your boyfriend, Flaurie?” he asked her.
With an eager nod, she said, “Uh huh!” in ready assent.
“Would you like to become my girlfriend?” he asked her the same thing in a different way.
“Yes! And again another,’Yes,’ Flanders,” said Miss Alvers in great crush.
And Flaurie Malo Alvers suddenly found herself in her first embrace. She felt his arms around herself in her women’s maillot, and she put her arms around him in his men’s swimsuit. Then they drew apart.
And he then said, “Alleluia!”
“Alleluia,” she said after him, her tongue and heart all confused with wonder at what she had just done in her one-piece swimsuit.
“Hallelujah!” he then said right after.
And she found herself saying also after him, “Hallelujah.”
“Are you a born-again believer, too, Flaurie?” he asked.
“No. But I can tell that you and your sister are,” said Miss Alvers.
“We need to get you saved,” said Flanders.
“I’m not one of you saved people,” she said. “Is that a bad sign for me?”
“Right now you are lost, O precious Flaurie,” he said. Compassion for her poured forth abundantly in his tone and in his words.
“I must then be one of those lost people,” said Flaurie Alvers in humbleness.
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“As soon as my sister came home from the pool last night and told me about the new girl in the city, we both knelt down together and prayed for you, Flaurie,” said Flanders.
“Thank you for praying for me, Flanders,” said Miss Alvers.
“Would you like to learn a little about the Saviour Who died for us and rose again?” asked Flanders.
Just then a voice on the loudspeaker declared, “The Legion Park pool is closing in ten minutes.”
Flaurie asked, “Flanders, is ten minutes enough time to tell me all about the Saviour?”
“It is better than no time at all,” he said.
But Flaurie thought about tomorrow and what new things that she could do tomorrow in her new one-piece swimsuit that would make it exciting to her. And she said, “Maybe not right now. I’ve got to make sure my maillot is good and dry for my walk tomorrow to the west side of De Pere.”
“My sister says that when she hangs up her one-piece swimsuit to dry after a spree in the pool at night, that it gets dry by the next day in the late afternoon,” said Flanders.
“That doesn’t leave me much time,” said Flaurie. “I want it dry by tomorrow morning.”
“You would not want to put on a wet swimsuit to start out your day,” he said.
“I’ve never put on a wet one-piece swimsuit before,” said Flaurie.
“Gretchen told me two things that women know about maillots that men do not know,” he said.
“What are they?” she asked.
And he told her, “For one, putting on a dry one-piece swimsuit is easier than putting on a wet one-piece swimsuit. And for another, taking off a wet one-piece swimsuit is easier than putting on a wet one-piece swimsuit.”
“I can see how men would not know about things like that,” said Miss Alvers.
“I bet that you have yet to learn that in your new life with your maillot, Flaurie,” he said.
“I did not know those things until you told me, Flanders,” said Flaurie.
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They looked around. There were no more pool people here anymore, except for her friend Meghan, who courteously stayed to wait for her brother. And in hurry the three left the pool just before the pool lights turned off. And the three went back to their homes. Yet again, a happiness let-down came down upon Flaurie’s spirit and soul. The fun that she had tonight at the pool surpassed the fun she had this day at Voyageur Park. But this crash that she was going through this second time was more grievous than the crash she had gone through that first time. She now had the sexiest maillot she could ever have imagined. And she found her first boyfriend of her life, and he was a Christian. And she now had an official best friend in his sister, and she was also a Christian. But her most beloved of these three were her maillot. It was “God” to her. And she was miserable in her new life with it. And, in rigorous reflections, she came to realize that her old life before the women’s maillot had come—even the happy life of living in the country—had really no direction and no meaning to it. In the countrysides, she was just living for the moment, doing all of her fun things, and not really finding the one thing that she was looking for. And what was she looking for in her whole life, if it weren’t this
women’s one-piece swimsuit? And if this comfortable maillot was not the thing to give her life its meaning and its purpose, what else could such a thing be, and where could she find such a thing that could give her life what it had always lacked? Where could a woman find such things in life as true satisfaction, real contentment, legitimate fulfillment? Meghan found it, though! So had Flanders!
Flaurie could tell that they had a joy that only they seemed to have in their lives. They said that they were both born-again believers. They both tried to share their faith with her. She had resisted their words. What did they have that she had not? It seemed to be a salvation through their Saviour. Did having a personal Saviour in one’s life make the difference in this life? It sure looked that way with the brother and the sister who befriended her. Flaurie thought further. Did having a personal Saviour in one’s life make the difference in the life to come? Did saved people go to Heaven? Did lost people go to Hell? In fear of hellfire, Flaurie Alvers dared not to reflect any more for now. Such things as
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this might scare a girl to death. She must stop this thinking.
The next day Flaurie’s one-piece swimsuit was still wet. Touching it on its hanger upon the shower nozzle, Flaurie could feel the top part all dry and the bottom part still wet. Maillots must dry from top to bottom when they were hung up to dry. So she chose to skip out on her walk in her maillot to west De Pere for now. She would go to Legion Park again later this day in east De Pere. And at eight o’clock, her swimming suit completely dry, she walked over for her third day in a row to Legion park in this east De Pere. She remembered her malaise of both instances, her angst about life and the afterlife. Maybe it was time to start listening to her two Christian friends. They could help.
Behold, Flanders and Meghan waiting for her at the gate to the pool area, both in their swimsuits and with gladness in their faces upon seeing her again. And together the three went through the gate and jumped into the pool. The three splashed and waded and swam around. Then Flaurie asked, “Flanders, Meghan, can I ask you two a personal question?”
At once both her best friend and her boyfriend said, “Sure,” and they nodded their heads in a definite, “Yes.” The three got out of the pool and sat on the edge.
And Flaurie asked, “How can you two be so happy all the time?”
Flanders said, “I am not happy all of the time. There are times when I am unhappy.”
And Meghan said, “We Christians have our ups and downs, too.”
“But you both have such fulness in your lives that I never had,” said Flaurie.
“That fulness is Christ,” said Flanders.
“We may not have perfect happiness, but we do have for sure joy in the Lord,” said Meghan.
“Happiness? Joy? Is there a difference between the two?” asked Miss Alvers.
“Uh huh,” said Flanders. “Happiness is based directly on circumstances. If circumstances are good, then a person is happy. And if circumstances are bad, then a person is unhappy.” He then went on to say, “That is the life of all unbelievers. But that is not so for believers.”
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Flaurie asked, “What is the life of you believers?”
“For us believers, we have joy, instead. Joy is not based on circumstances, but rather on Christ,” said Flanders.”In good times and in bad times, we Christians must keep our eyes on Jesus. When the bad times come upon me and Meghan, we do not dwell on the trials, but rather on our Saviour. Pastor always tells us in his sermons, ‘Christ is bigger than our problem.’ And we both wait upon God, and He takes care of our trial in His time and in His way.”
“That’s something that I don’ t know how to do,” said Flaurie.
“It is a fruit of the spirit that God gives only to His children,” said Meghan.
“Do you mean that this joy is something that only born-again Christians have?” asked Miss Alvers.
“Yes,” said Meghan. “But only if they live it.”
Flanders went on to say, “In Psalm 16:8, God’s Word says, ‘I have set the Lord always before me: because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.’”
“God can do that?” asked Flaurie. “God does that?”
“Yes, Flaurie,” said Flanders. “But you’ve got to let Him do His work.”
“What if the world is falling down upon you in your life as a Christian, Flanders. What then?” asked Flaurie Alvers.
“Then we have in God’s Word in Romans 8:28,” said Flanders. And he went ahead and recited this verse to her: “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
“Is that a promise from God to the believers only again?” asked Flaurie.
“Yes,” said Flanders. “For us Christians, whatever trial comes upon us is for our own good in the long run. And we spiritual Christians can rest in the Lord in our trials and wait to see so good things come from them down the road a way.”
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“Then bad things that happen to us lost people will not necessarily work out for our good,” said Flaurie Alvers. “Is that so?”
Meghan said, “We Christians are made more spiritual when our faith is tested in the fires of trials.”
“To me, all trials I call ‘the bad things,’” said Flaurie.
Meghan said, “To me and Flanders, these ‘bad things,’ as you call them, are ‘the good things,’ instead. They make us to become more like Christ.”
“What really helps me out in my times of testing as a believer, is that I know that I will get rewards in Heaven if I humble myself before God and see things eternally,” said Flanders.
“Is that in the Bible, too, Flanders?” asked Flaurie.
“It is, Flaurie,” said Flanders. “II Corinthians 4:17-18. But I cannot remember quite how it goes. Would you read it for us, Meghan?”
And Meghan went and got her pocket New Testament from her bag by the bench and came back with it. She searched the Scriptures and read this passage out loud: “For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.”
“I think I understand you Christians,” said Flaurie. “You can face the temporary problems in this life, because you know that you’re going to Heaven in the life to come, where there are no such things as problems.”
“Yes, girl!” said Meghan.
“And if we live our walk in Christ with this outlook, we believers will have a crown to give back to our Saviour when we come home to Heaven,” said Flanders.
“A crown?” asked Flaurie.
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“The crown of life,” said Flanders.
“A crown for those believers who are faithful in life’s trials,” said Meghan. “For the humble Christians who do not murmur or complain or blame God for things.”
“It is written, ‘Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him,’” said Flanders. “Sister, where is that verse?”
“It’s James 1:12, Brother,” said Meghan.
“Thank you, Meghan,” said Flanders.
“Are there any verses that tell a maillot girl like myself not to seek her happiness in her women’s one-piece swimsuit as I have heart and mind and body?” asked Flaurie.
“Yes,” said Flanders. “I know three of them. I know exactly what they say and what they mean and where they are.” And he began at once, “First of all, in John 4:14 it is written about Jesus, ‘But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.’ Second of all, in John 6:35 it is written about Jesus, ‘And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst.’ Third of all, in John 14:27 it is written about Jesus, ‘Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.’”
“I believe!” exclaimed Flaurie Malo Alvers. “Jesus must be the answer to my life!”
In the passion of the moment, Flaurie jumped into the pool headfirst, and came back out, drenched completely all wet once again, and came back up to join her two friends in rejoicing.
Flanders then said in a most affectionate tone, both as boyfriend and as soul-winner, “Let us pray together and get you saved, O Flaurie.”
Just then a supernatural blast of frigid air roared in upon this pool from the north. Never before
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had so chill a wind blown in August in Wisconsin before like this one. Satan brought this sudden cold front to this park in his ceaseless war against the Saviour and so great salvation. The Devil works overtime to keep from losing souls to Christ. And he did not want Flaurie Alvers to become a born-again child of God like Flanders and Meghan. And Miss Alvers was the wettest person of this Legion Park pool right now. And her so-comfortable maillot was now fiercely uncomfortably freezing. Yet she could not take it off now. Besides that, Flaurie was not ready to take it off anywhere.
Then, after that, the pool announcer declared, “The pool will close in ten minutes.”
Flaurie asked, “Should we pray my prayer in the pool building, Flanders?”
In regret he said, “There will be too much distraction in there right now with all of these frozen swimmers trying to get away.”
“I’ve got to get home,” said Flaurie, trembling severely in her one-piece swimsuit.
“Let’s go to mine and Flanders’s place, Flaurie, and my brother can lead you through the prayer right there,” said Meghan.
“We have to leave the pool now,” said Flanders.
Flaurie looked around and saw only herself and her two friends still here in the pool area. All the other swimmers were either in the building and getting ready to leave or were already gone out of the building.
And the pool lights were turning off now. “Quickly,” said Flanders in this dire moment. And he grabbed the hands of Flaurie and Meghan with his two hands, and he pulled them with him to get out of the outdoors with the winter-type wind chill here in the park. They sought warmth in the pool building, and they saw no one else here anymore. And the building’s interior lights began to turn off.
“Quickly,” said Flanders to the two women again. And he again grabbed their hands. And they all three fled the pool building before it became dark in here. Again they were all three outside. The panic that had come upon the Legion Park pool was so fierce that already no one was to be seen even in
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this whole park now. The dark of summer night seemed as dark as midnight in the Arctic. And it felt just as cold here in De Pere this eerie chilly night. Flaurie was freezing cold in her women’s one-piece swimsuit—colder even than her two friends in their swimming suits. She was the last one of the three who had been in that pool. How she regretting having jumped back in on impulse after having almost gotten all dry, sitting upon the edge and listening to the good preaching for that good long while. Yet, now she was getting so cold that she now began to take thought more for her life than for her soul.
Flanders said, “Let us go now to your apartment, Flaurie. We three can warm up and put on dry clothes and get you good and saved.”
Yet Flaurie stubbornly said, “I will not take off my one-piece swimsuit. It is all that I got.”
Meghan said, “Once we get to your place, you can put on something warm and you won’t be so cold anymore.”
“I will not take off my maillot to pray the prayer,” said Flaurie carnally.
“What do you mean?” asked Meghan.
“I mean that when I pray the prayer and get saved, I want to be in this when it happens.” said Flaurie most foolishly. She did not want to wear anything else but this one-piece swimsuit when she became a born-again Christian.
“You might freeze to death pretty soon if we don’t get to your place real soon,” said Flanders.
“I love my maillot too much to betray it now,” said Miss Alvers.
Flanders grabbed both women’s arms and said, “Quickly!” And he pulled hard. Meghan ran with him. Flaurie resisted Flanders and pulled back with her body. Flanders could not make Flaurie to seek her needful warmth. She seemed willing to die if it meant not taking off her one-piece swimsuit at home to get saved. Flanders and Meghan came back and stood before the willful young woman.
Then Flaurie said, “Tomorrow, maybe, if the wind dies down by then and the warmth of August comes back and we are under the pool lights again, Flanders, Meghan, then I shall pray the prayer.”
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Meghan asked, “Do you mean that you want to wait until tomorrow to get saved here and in this maillot of yours?”
“I wish to find Christ, myself in this one-piece swimsuit. Yes. That’s a promise,” said Miss Alvers.
“The pool is not open at night after today. Tonight is the last night for this pool.” said Meghan. “We cannot win your soul in this Legion Park pool tomorrow night.”
“Well, then how about tomorrow afternoon under the sunlight?” asked Miss Alvers. “I will be glad to find Jesus, myself in my maillot, in the daylight here in this pool.”
“About seeking salvation, Flaurie, Satan always wants his own to say, ‘Later, sometime,’” urged Meghan.
“It has to be in this pool and it has to be in my maillot,” said Flaurie.
Meghan and Flanders looked at each other. Meghan asked him, “I’m freezing to death out here. Flanders, should we dare wait until tomorrow to lead her through the prayer?”
Flanders gave forth a heavy sigh and said, “Tomorrow is the pool’s ‘pooch day,’ Only dogs can use the pool that day.”
“I don’t want to wait too long to get saved,” said Flaurie. “How about the day after pooch day?”
Flanders gnashed his teeth and said, “Pooch day is the last day for the Legion Park pool for the year. There is no next day for people to jump in and splash around this pool after pooch day, Flaurie. After tonight, we cannot get you saved in this pool in your maillot in the water, night or day.”
There was righteous ire in his voice.
Less patient than her brother, Meghan said, “I’m going home to get warm. I don’t know about you, Flaurie.”
And Flanders, his own Christian patience tested beyond its endurance, then said, “Then we
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have to leave you to your sins, O Flaurie. I am not going to get frostbite out here, because a worldly woman with a fetish won’t get saved in anything other than her swimming suit.” And he and his sister turned their backs on Flaurie and began to walk briskly away.
With a wisdom of a woman about to lose her soul and with the desperation of her plight of probably freezing to death, Flaurie Alvers called forth to them both, “Boyfriend, best friend, I can still get saved in this one-piece swimsuit wet as it is in my warm apartment. My place is only a block-and-a half away. Your place is probably farther. You are probably too far away from here to walk to your place and not freeze. But none of us are too far away to walk to Lewis Street and not freeze. You both can come into my humble warm apartment. I’ve got nice brown carpet in a huge living room. I’ve got good gray carpet in my bedroom. I’ve got a nice little table that we can sit down at in my little kitchen.
I’ve got a warm wall furnace that I can find out how to turn on and make us feel comfortable after what terrible weather we suddenly got this night. My lights are homey and cozy desk lamps and table lamps and floor lamps. I can make the three of us hot cocoa. And we can eat leftovers of my coffeecake that I made this afternoon. I want Christ. I need Christ. Forgive me my god I made out of my maillot.”
Brother and sister looked at each other in this dangerous chill factor wind here outside yet at Legion Park. Meghan asked, “Could we go over there and in our wet swimsuits lead her to the Saviour, O good brother?”
“That we can do,” said Flanders. “Thank you for your accommodations, Flaurie. My sister and I live in west De Pere. We would never make it back home without a miracle from God.”
The three stood there, risking frostbite. “Quickly,” said Meghan.
“Quickly,” agreed Flanders. Without any grabbing of hands, the three began running to Flaurie’s nice place of warmth. And they arrived in Godspeed. And they went up the steps into Flaurie’s upper apartment. Flanders got her furnace running nice and warm for this most irregular summer night. Meghan set her Bible and her brother’s Bible upon Flaurie’s kitchen table. And Flaurie
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made three big ceramic mugs of unsweetened cocoa and set them and a box of sugar cubes and a bottle of powder creamer and her three favorite spoons upon the kitchen table. And she set three China platters, each with a big piece of her homemade coffeecake with forks also upon the kitchen table. And they sat down to win a soul for the Saviour. Praise the Good Lord for this good warmth that the three now felt in their swimsuits, albeit now thawing out and dripping upon the tile floor of this kitchen. And Flanders went on to lead Flaurie in her women’s one-piece swimsuit to the Saviour of the world with this sinners’ prayer, line by line: “Dear Father in Heaven: I am chief among sinners. And it is my own fault. If I had committed only one sin in my otherwise-perfect life, I would have to go to Hell and to pay for that one sin for forever in the lake of fire. But I have not committed just one sin, but a countless number of sins. I cannot save myself. My torments in the lake of fire is my harvest that I have reaped from all of my sins. But Jesus does not want me to go there. He wants me to go to Heaven, instead. That’s why He willingly went to the cross of Calvary to shed His perfect blood and to suffer the agony of crucifixion, and to die in my place. His death pays for my sins. His death takes away my sins. His death nullifies the eternal punishment for my sins. I ask You now, O Lord, to forgive me and to cleanse me and to help me to repent of all of my trespasses and iniquities and transgressions. I confess that the Jesus Who died for me is also the Jesus Who arose from the grave on the third day. Christ arose! And He lives today. This is Easter, the holiday that commemorates the miraculous and glorious resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ. I ask You now, O God Above: ‘Would you become my Saviour and give me everlasting life?’ I’m trusting You and You alone to do all of this. Jesus saves! Thank You, O Heavenly Father Above. In the name of Your Son, Christ Jesus. Amen.”
Just then the fierce Arctic wind outside suddenly ceased and became still and quiet and warm.
Satan had lost Flaurie. Jesus had found Flaurie. And Flaurie had just become a born-again believer in Christ. All was now well with her soul. And she was now a Christian just as Flanders and Meghan were. And Flaurie suddenly found herself saying, with the wisdom of her now-indwelling Holy Spirit,
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“In my newfound personal Saviour I have now found something far better than my women’s one-piece swimsuit!”
Flanders said, “The girl’s mighty saved, sister!”
“What a turnaround that Christ made in you, Flaurie!” said Meghan.
“What did I ever see in this women’s maillot of mine?” asked Flaurie Alvers, repentant in Christ now for forever.
It was the next day now. And Flanders and Flaurie were on their official first date as boyfriend-and-girlfriend-in-Christ. It was noon time, and their date was taking place at the VFW Park Pool in the west part of De Pere under the bright sunlight. “I can see that it is Pooch Day for this pool today just as it is for our other pool today,” said Miss Alvers.
“I had not stopped to think about this pool here in all of our action last night over there,” said Flanders. Then he said, “It makes sense that it be Pooch Day for both of the outdoor pools in De Pere
the same day.”
“August is only half done, and the pools are done already for the summer,” said Flaurie.
“The lifeguards have to go back to college,” said Flanders.
“When do the pools in town open for the year?” asked Flaurie.
“Halfway into June,” said Flanders.
“That’s only about two months or so for city people to use the pools,” said Flaurie.
“Here in Wisconsin our summers are short, and our winters are long,” said Flanders.
“Such pretty and handsome dogs jumping in and splashing around,” said Flaurie in joy of the Lord.
“Too bad that we cannot jump in and splash around with them in the pool,” said Flanders.
“My one-piece swimsuit will just have to do without pool water this time,” said Miss Alvers,
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joyful in Christ.
“I’m glad that you do not make your maillot a god anymore, Flaurie,” said Flanders.
“Are you glad that I still put it on?” she asked.
“Yeah!” he said. “It’s sexy, and you’re sexy.”
“For now on only the Lord is God for me, O boyfriend,” said Miss Alvers.
“Look at that over there, Flaurie,” said Flanders, pointing, also admiring the dogs in their day of the pool.
She looked toward where he was pointing, and she saw a Collie dog-paddling across the pool with a Shetland Sheepdog standing upon the Collie’s back.
“My my,” said Flaurie. “I am beginning to think that watching the pooches playing in the pool might be more fun than us two playing in the pool, Boyfriend.”
“One’s a Collie, and the other is a Miniature Collie,” said Flanders.
“A Collie and a Sheltie,” said Miss Alvers another way.
“And, girlfriend, look at that German Shepherd—what canine talent!” he said, pointing again.
Miss Alvers looked and saw a German Shepherd jumping up out of the water, making a somersault into the air, and landing back down into the pool again. And he did it again. And he did it again. “Why, he’s a regular dolphin!” exclaimed Flaurie in rejoicing in Christ.
Then she saw a Border Collie doing his tricks. “Look at that black and white dog, Flanders! A man is throwing little round things to him from the ledge, and he’s catching each one of them and they are gone, one by one. What are those?”
“I do believe that they are doughnuts,” said Flanders.
“Cake doughnuts!” exclaimed Flaurie in awe.
“He eats them as soon as he grabs them,” said Flanders.
“It looks like the man ran out of them now,” said Miss Alvers.
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“Doughnuts, Flaurie. Too many pool games like this and the dog will be ‘round like a doughnut,’” said Flanders with a laugh.
“He probably burned up all the calories with the workout he just had in playing,” said Flaurie. Then Flanders’s eyes grew big, and he said to her, “Look at the size of those two dogs over there, girlfriend!” She looked and saw two gigantic dogs standing upon the pool’s ledge toward her and Flanders’s right.
“They are each bigger than most men,” said Flaurie. “And they have not one inch of body fat.”
“One is a St. Bernard. The other must be a Mastiff,” said Flanders.
“I used to read up about dogs. I learned that those two breeds are the two biggest dogs of all the dog breeds,” said Flaurie Alvers.
“It looks like mischief is in both of their faces,” said Flanders.
“They must be getting ready to play a game,” said Flaurie.
“What kind of game can the two biggest pooches of pooch day play here at the pool today, do you think?” asked Flanders.
“I would not be surprised if they both did a cannonball dive, boyfriend,” said Miss Alvers.
“They are kind of too close to our pool’s edge for my comfort,” said Flanders.
“Don’t worry. They won’t bite,” said Flaurie.
“Tell me that they won’t land on me,” said Flanders.
“Don’t worry. They will not fall on us,” said Flaurie Alvers.
Then the boyfriend-and-girlfriend-in-the-Lord grew silent and waited and watched for this imminent game on pooch day for these two most immense pooches. And it was indeed a cannonball dive. The St. Bernard dog and the Mastiff dog jumped simultaneously off of the ledge and lifted up all of their legs in the air and landed upon their bottoms upon the water.
Splash!
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Two great waves from the pool fell down upon boyfriend and girlfriend and drenched them head to foot with more pool water than were they to have jumped into this pool in their selves.
“Girlfriend,” said Flanders with a hearty laugh, “didn’t you say that your one-piece swimsuit will have to do without pool water this day?”
“I was wrong, boyfriend,” said Miss Alvers. “It seems that today my women’s one-piece swimsuit will not have to do without pool water this day.” She laughed just as heartily.
And the two big dogs climbed up out of the pool in front of them, stood to both sides of them, and shook themselves from the water.
“Praise the Lord, girlfriend!” said Flanders, relishing this moment.
“Thank You, God,” said Flaurie, also enjoying this pooch day.
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